A Prayer

"God teach me to be constant but not overwhelming, uplifting but not pedistaling, encouraging but not flattering, challenging but not demanding, honest but not forceful, gentle but not soft, meak but not lame, joyful but not overzelous, motivating but not nagging, peaceful but not oblivious, and above all to love friends the way I ought to love them and not for personal gain." I don't know if you go through hard times, I'd imagine you do, but I'm going through one. I have this crossroads of how I want to love a friend and how I should love a friend. I won't go into detail, but I bet you've been to that crossroad, even if not in the same story. It's this great desire that we have to be care about, loved and honored by other people. Sure affirmation and care are vital from people in our lives, why would God show us such community in the Bible, but there is always a point when you get close enough to a friend that you have to choose to love them over keeping them. What I mean is the hardest thing about friendship is being the friend you need, they need you to be above what they want you to be. We can be feel-goody, affirming friends all the time which is always great to have an encourager, but we also sometimes have to love them in a hard way, a way that you must choose to be ok with that person not taking well what you have to say but you know that you still have to say it. It's a choice, do you love them enough to choose the path that's best for them and maybe not seemingly best for you, or do you go on not loving them fully because you're scared to lose them? It's a general statement, I realize, but maybe you understand what I've saying.

Shields Carried Away

"So Shishak King of Egypt came up against Jerusalem. He took away the treasures of the house of the Lord and the treasures of the king's house. He took away everything. He also took away the shields of gold that Solomon had made, and King Rehoboam made in their place shields of bronze and committed them to the hands of the offices of the guard, who kept the door of the king's house. And as often as the king went into the house of the Lord, the guard came and carried them and brought them back to the guardroom. And when he humbled himself the wrath of the Lord turned from him, so as not to make a complete destruction. Moreover, conditions were good in Judah" (2 Chron 12:9-12). I look at these verses and the preceding ones and resonate with Rehoboam. Verse one of chapter twelve says "When the rule of Rehoboam was established, and he was strong, he abandoned the law of the Lord." That's where he went wrong- How often do good things happen in my life and I no longer "need" God? Sadly, I'd say it happens a lot. I'm walking into a new setting- a restaurant, a party, a new class or something else and I'm nervous, feeling self-conscious about my personality or looks and my instinct is praying that God would make it all ok. Then when I am comfortable or I find lots of happiness in that setting I lose that initial dependence on God and go about no leaning on Him until I "need" Him next. But God is not a God to be used at our pleasure, He is the God of plans and great purpose. So He levels Rehoboam and Judah in this part of our history. That not to say that God will level us, as though He's the grumpy Father who has a great temper for punishment, oh no, but to say that He knows how to bring us back to His side. But of this story what stuck out to me was the shields- these precious and very valuable shields his father made had now been taken away; he desperately makes bronze shields but he is forced to humble himself to God. Isn't this exactly like me? I cringe as I think of all the defenses, all the shields I put up around my life daily, putting out a stiff arm to vulnerability. I use all my own strengths and draw them together to war on my personal enemies taking up the meager shield I have made. God continues to pull those shields down but I keep making new ones, even pitiful ones of far less strength and worth. How sad. How truly sad that I CAN reach Rehoboam's ending of this story so much quicker by allowing the Bible to teach me its wisdom. Look, "when he humbled himself the wrath of the Lord turned from him." He wasn't destroyed, although he should have taken his own lesson to heart later in life. But we can learn from him- In God's presence there is FULLNESS of joy and without God the situation is not pretty, read it yourself.