I've always looked for a moment that would change my life. A moment that would alter my reality and set me straight. A moment that I would always look back on and say that was the day that things changed, things became different, and I forever steered my life in the right direction. But I now realize the deep problems with that sentiment.
As I grew up most people I encountered in the Christian life pointed to a particular calendar day in a particular year where they were saved- at summer camp or sitting in the pew at church or in the desperate hours of loss. They reference that day as when life changed. They were lost but now they're found. And as much as I've been totally ok with not having a particular date I look back on to mark my Christian start, I think I've subconsciously still been waiting on a day that would alter my existence.
That may sound strange and you may be wondering if I'm saying I'm not "saved." I'm not saying that. I've been redeemed, no doubt. I'm saying though that we hear so many testimonies about I once was lost but now I'm found and we're prone to want that huge jump start so much so that we sit around waiting on it, all along letting life and love pass us by.
Everyday I wake up wanting that miraculous event to occur that will alter my existence. But I read a verse just now and it occurred to me that the event has already happened. And it's not the event that I want, it's the shedding of all the human weight I carry around each day.
"For the grace of God has appeared; bringing salvation to all men, instructing us to deny ungodlinesss and worldly desires and to live sensibly, righteously and godly in the present age" Titus 2:11-12.
The life altering change has happened. Jesus lived perfectly, died to take my place and defeated death by rising from it. The grace of God has appeared. It's happened and salvation has come. But what I didn't learn very well is that once I come on board with this belief (getting saved, that is) I've now entered a new fight. It's fight against evil, against our humanity, against myself. You may be different, but my ungodliness and worldly desires didn't go anywhere after I became a Christian and no matter what miraculous events happen in my life, they'll always be hanging around. And until I shed this earthly body I'll continue on in my humanity, unable to escape it's grasp without Jesus.
But the key to the battle is not some one-time, life-altering event. It's the day-to-day struggle, the moment-to-moment defeat of selfish desires, evil thoughts, slothfulness and materialism. It's not some event that's going to happen; it's my daily decision to be like Christ and to honor Him above myself. It's my committing to let Him do it because I'm continuing to remind myself that I can't do it. It's not a cop out; it's not laissez faire; it's not taking the easy road. It's actually taking the really hard road by letting Him do all. I don't think it's something you can really teach kids or new Christians. I think it's a surrender you've got to feel, to realize and recognize when you get so tired of fighting the battle on your own. That's the spot where God really works.
Life's about the day-to-day struggles and tribulations that make us more like Him. A moment probably won't change your life, but a lifetime will. A lifetime of combating the worldly desires knowing that He's working and He's doing and He's providing much, much more than we could ask or hope for.
