"O Lord, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not hear? Or cry to you, 'violence!' and you will not save? Why do you make me see iniquity, and why do you idly look at wrong? Destruction and violence are before me; strife and contention arise. So the law is paralyzed, and justice never goes forth. For the wicked surround the righteous; so justice goes forth perverted" Habakkuk 1:2-4.
Have you ever felt like this? I think I can successfully vouch for just about every person I've ever shared life with that we've all had our moments. We've all wanted to shout at God and ask, "Where are you?!?!" We've all wondered as if to say that our plan is better than God's as we shake an angry fist at the perfect Planner of the universe. We have this lase fair version of God as though He's the guy that lazily sits on His magnificent throne up in heaven going in and out of slumber watching idly as we destroy ourselves and everything around us.
But, you say, there are all these terrible people who get great jobs, get spouses they don't deserve, have the ability to do just about anything in life they want and to top it all off everyone loves them and wants to be like them. It's not fair. You say, here you are trying to follow God and you aren't getting the things you signed up for. You want the job, the money, the admiration....really? Is that what's going to make you happy?...Are you sure?
I think we have eyes that are too nearsighted. We see the immediate and grasp for it when the eternal reward of waiting is of so much more value. I think God is working in the midst of us and we either choose to not recognize the work as God or we want something else are so turn disdainfully at Him to hold a grudge. God says, "Look among the nations, and see; wonder and be astounded. For I AM doing a work in your days that you would not believe if told" vs5. God is working. God is doing great things in our generation. God is the same God that called down fire and hail to help His people. He's the same God that brought plagues to get His people out of harm, the same God that kept Jonah safe in the fish. He's the same God that will never leave us or forsake us. But, He's God and we're not. "If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay" 2:3b. We have a very jaded timeline when it comes to waiting. God has an eternal timeline.
"Let all the earth keep silence before the Lord" vs20b. Maybe the next time you're wrestling with God over your timeline and over your immediate 'need' for some big issue, take a second and realize that He's God. He's an active, aggressive, passionate, loving and powerful Father that is in all things, knows all things and provides all things. Maybe instead of bombarding the gates of heaven with all your requests, sit back and keep silent before the Lord. Either way, He'll sustain you, but I bet the fastest way to conform to the image of God is to wait patiently for Him and keep silent in His presence and know that He IS working, that He IS moving, and He IS doing great things that we wouldn't even believe if told.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Singlehood
Our world doesn’t respond well to singles. Let me repeat that, in my opinion, our world responds incorrectly to singles. By ‘our world’ I mean this sudo-Christian, southern comfort, moralistic society that most of us have been brought up in and that we don’t truly realize the magnitude of influence it has over us and the strength it carries to which we live our lives by. Singlehood, in our society, is viewed as a waiting period; a period when we’re trying to figure out what we want and how we’re going to get there; a place of uncertainty where a person continues to move around and switch jobs because they aren’t ready to settle down- singlehood. Mainly though, it’s a place that people feel sorry for you because you haven’t found your one true love that we’re all so convinced will make everything so much better and make our world and future so much more certain. GAG. Ok, so now you’re either thinking, “yeah, she feels that way because she’s young and doesn’t know any better” or “now Katie marriage isn’t all roses” or better yet “everyone needs that time to find themselves”. BOO. We have popularized and idolized marriage as though it’s the crowning victory to our earthly lives. Ok, ok, thus says the cynic, right? Thus says the single girl who’s trying to cope with the fact that she doesn’t have anyone and is lonely you say. You can say whatever you please, but the truth is that our world idealizes marriage. We put life into phases: childhood, the dreaded teenage years (remember that mom?), college with a little sowing of your wild oats and then a short phase of singlehood along with young professionalism and then marriage. You’ve made it. People will take you seriously, they will assume you’re mature, they will invite you over for dinner, and they will speak to you like an adult. However, if you’re still single then you’re still trying to figure things out and just need a little more time so they’ll politely comply for you to grow up.
Our world doesn’t respond well to singles. We have singles Sunday school classes that the whole point is for the sexes to meet one another, start a relationship and get married. We want married couples, we want families, we want generations. We’re scared of single people. We either don’t believe they have enough self-confidence and faith in God to be single or we think them too volatile to be put in any sort of important position. After all, they’re still looking for themselves. Even those in unhappy marriages or marriages that aren’t quite as rosy as they would have thought still prefer to be in their current position than to brave the storm again and become alone. Now you may say the national divorce percentages are astounding, but do you know of people getting divorced that their situation isn't unbearable?
I find our world’s view of singles interesting. I find our church’s view of singles interesting. I find them interesting when I think of all the magnificent single people in the Bible that accomplished super-human feats. As a matter of fact, I would dare say that most of the people in the Bible who accomplished great things were single. Paul actually remarks rather against it on some occasions. Now I don’t necessarily take Paul’s side, I’m still a proponent of marriage, but my point is that we idealize marriage to an unhealthy level causing single people to fall into the vortex of lies about how much better their lives should be. “Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of steadfast love” Jonah 2:8. I think we make marriage an idol. I think we miss out on a lot of what God has to offer us because we tell ourselves what the next step of life is supposed to be and how it’s supposed to look. We wait for marriage and miss out on the abundance of steadfast love and exceeding joy that flows to us from a Savior, providing us with all we need to not only survive but to thrive. We as a church miss out on the great things single people have to offer us and we accentuate married couples as the best ministers. “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in His way” Psalm 37:7a. From a single person’s perspective, know that the pressure to settle and give in is astounding in our culture. Don’t miss out on either the greatness of singlehood or the greatness that single people have to offer you if you take the chance to get to know just how special God made them. It’s not a waiting period, it’s life. I’m not volatile; I’m actually much more stable than most.
Our world doesn’t respond well to singles. We have singles Sunday school classes that the whole point is for the sexes to meet one another, start a relationship and get married. We want married couples, we want families, we want generations. We’re scared of single people. We either don’t believe they have enough self-confidence and faith in God to be single or we think them too volatile to be put in any sort of important position. After all, they’re still looking for themselves. Even those in unhappy marriages or marriages that aren’t quite as rosy as they would have thought still prefer to be in their current position than to brave the storm again and become alone. Now you may say the national divorce percentages are astounding, but do you know of people getting divorced that their situation isn't unbearable?
I find our world’s view of singles interesting. I find our church’s view of singles interesting. I find them interesting when I think of all the magnificent single people in the Bible that accomplished super-human feats. As a matter of fact, I would dare say that most of the people in the Bible who accomplished great things were single. Paul actually remarks rather against it on some occasions. Now I don’t necessarily take Paul’s side, I’m still a proponent of marriage, but my point is that we idealize marriage to an unhealthy level causing single people to fall into the vortex of lies about how much better their lives should be. “Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of steadfast love” Jonah 2:8. I think we make marriage an idol. I think we miss out on a lot of what God has to offer us because we tell ourselves what the next step of life is supposed to be and how it’s supposed to look. We wait for marriage and miss out on the abundance of steadfast love and exceeding joy that flows to us from a Savior, providing us with all we need to not only survive but to thrive. We as a church miss out on the great things single people have to offer us and we accentuate married couples as the best ministers. “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in His way” Psalm 37:7a. From a single person’s perspective, know that the pressure to settle and give in is astounding in our culture. Don’t miss out on either the greatness of singlehood or the greatness that single people have to offer you if you take the chance to get to know just how special God made them. It’s not a waiting period, it’s life. I’m not volatile; I’m actually much more stable than most.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Jonah
I just finished reading through the Book of Jonah and I never cease to resonate with the man himself. Strong willed, overly zealot on many occasions, unnecessarily passionate in some emotional areas, wanting to have the ability to figure God out down to an art of knowing what He will and won’t do, firm in my own opinions, convinced I know what’s best in life, hot tempered to a fault. Yeah, (sigh)…I resonate with Jonah. “For I knew that You are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and relenting from disaster” Jonah 4:2b. As much as I disagree with the Catholics on the point of confession, I still find myself willing to go along with it if it means having my sins forgiven instantaneously if only I say them aloud. What’s the joke? Something about how Catholics flood to mass and confession on Sundays because of what they did on Saturday night? Sounds silly and yet most of us operate on the same standard. We do things we know aren’t right because we want to play both sides. We want the instant gratification and satisfaction and yet we want the forgiveness and free ticket to eternal rewards.
We believe in a god that forgives us of all our sins immediately and without regard to why we committed them or whether we are planning on committing them again. We emphasize the grace and mercy part of God because we need something to make us feel better because of our total depravity. We have churches either disregarding our depravity and making everyone think everything’s peachy or churches that bang depravity so far into your heads that you feel helpless against sin. Either way, the unfortunate end for many listeners that choose not to be individual thinkers is that we sin and then believe in a god who realizes we don’t mean to and so of course forgives us. We believe, far too often, in a god of our own concoction, our own imagination, a god that makes our lives make more sense and that makes us feel better about what we’re doing.
Jonah knew God, and he for sure knew he couldn’t hide from Him. I think when Jonah fled at first he thought, “This is going to make me mad, God. You’re going to save these dreadful people who have been living as though they have nothing to lose. These people who call out your name half-heartedly, the believers who slide by in society and yet aren’t really committed, and yet you’re still going to save them. I hate this, God. Is there any reason I’m following whole-heartedly right now when people who get to play both sides still make it?” But you know what my favorite part of this whole event is? We get to see a different trait of God that makes me realize His deep intimacy and core knowledge of how each of us are woven together. God interacts with Jonah very differently from other noteworthy people in his time. Jonah practically yells and is certainly angry with God throughout this experience and yet God never blinks and acts disrespected. I think it’s because this is the way Jonah learns and the way he gets through is own stubborn nature to find the authority and greatness of God. There’s no doubt Jonah is being incredibly selfish and self-righteous but yet I think God uses His pride for His glory and ultimate will. I think God chisels down Jonah piece by piece in a way much more effective than if He had gotten mad.
There are many things I’m yet to learn about God. But as I read this passage I think I’ve discovered one more. God interacts with me much differently than He interacts with anyone else. It doesn’t mean that He’s a different God or He changes from person to person. It means that He created me so delicately, so perfectly, so intricately that He addresses me according to my need and my ability to comprehend His point. I, like Jonah, want for things that I have not right to and have a skewed version of my entitlement. We know not how far the great riches that await us outweigh anything earthly that the scales do not even tip and we too easily succumb to the manifest of appeal for earthly claim and endearment.
We believe in a god that forgives us of all our sins immediately and without regard to why we committed them or whether we are planning on committing them again. We emphasize the grace and mercy part of God because we need something to make us feel better because of our total depravity. We have churches either disregarding our depravity and making everyone think everything’s peachy or churches that bang depravity so far into your heads that you feel helpless against sin. Either way, the unfortunate end for many listeners that choose not to be individual thinkers is that we sin and then believe in a god who realizes we don’t mean to and so of course forgives us. We believe, far too often, in a god of our own concoction, our own imagination, a god that makes our lives make more sense and that makes us feel better about what we’re doing.
Jonah knew God, and he for sure knew he couldn’t hide from Him. I think when Jonah fled at first he thought, “This is going to make me mad, God. You’re going to save these dreadful people who have been living as though they have nothing to lose. These people who call out your name half-heartedly, the believers who slide by in society and yet aren’t really committed, and yet you’re still going to save them. I hate this, God. Is there any reason I’m following whole-heartedly right now when people who get to play both sides still make it?” But you know what my favorite part of this whole event is? We get to see a different trait of God that makes me realize His deep intimacy and core knowledge of how each of us are woven together. God interacts with Jonah very differently from other noteworthy people in his time. Jonah practically yells and is certainly angry with God throughout this experience and yet God never blinks and acts disrespected. I think it’s because this is the way Jonah learns and the way he gets through is own stubborn nature to find the authority and greatness of God. There’s no doubt Jonah is being incredibly selfish and self-righteous but yet I think God uses His pride for His glory and ultimate will. I think God chisels down Jonah piece by piece in a way much more effective than if He had gotten mad.
There are many things I’m yet to learn about God. But as I read this passage I think I’ve discovered one more. God interacts with me much differently than He interacts with anyone else. It doesn’t mean that He’s a different God or He changes from person to person. It means that He created me so delicately, so perfectly, so intricately that He addresses me according to my need and my ability to comprehend His point. I, like Jonah, want for things that I have not right to and have a skewed version of my entitlement. We know not how far the great riches that await us outweigh anything earthly that the scales do not even tip and we too easily succumb to the manifest of appeal for earthly claim and endearment.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Grieved
When I take the time to think about the destruction and total depravity of most of our world it makes me shudder. Much too often I erase it as soon as it enters because the pain of fully divulging myself into such thoughts would last a lifetime. We don't take the salvation of others as seriously as we ought. We cast it aside and are thankful for our own salvation, as though we can rest easy and live lives of harmony because we've "found" God and everything else is taken care of. WRONG.
"Woe to those who lie on beds of ivory and stretch themselves out on their couches, and eat lambs from the flock and calves from the midst of the stall, who sing idle songs to the sound of the harp and like David invent for themselves instruments of music, who drink wine in bowls and anoint themselves with the finest oils, but are not grieved over the ruin of Joseph!" Amos 6:4-6.
Are you grieved over the ruin of our world? Are you grieved because even whole churches and certainly active participants in other places of worship actually abhor God and do not follow His teachings? Are you saddened that people have the option of church and yet do not attend because they see it as hypocritical or they are too "busy" to go? Are we grieved?
We're not so different from the people back in the Old Testament are we? We still overindulge and take our eyes off of the prize. We still sit idly as the world continues to fall into utter darkness. We still do things that bring us temporary comfort because we have never chosen to taste the eternal reward that God holds right in front of us everyday. We are much too easily pleased with the trivial and we settle for momentary happiness that flees as quickly as it came. It flees because it wasn't meant to fill the space we're giving it. It flees because only God can fill that void and yet therein lies the great mystery about why we struggle so indepthly to fight off His reign.
I look at the verses from Amos and I realize we're a whole lot like these people. We want the finest things, we want the nicest meals and richest furniture. We want the big houses and fine living. But does it bring us joy? There's always going to be someone that has more, that's more successful, that's smarter, that's thinks more indepthly, that's more intuitive, that's more fun, that's more cunning, that's prettier, that can outsmart you. There's always going to be someone. But what matters is that which is eternal. The salvation of others matter. It matters much more than gold or silver. Think about it- we long for riches like beds of ivory just as the Israelites but we're going to a place where the streets are paved with gold if we decide to cast aside those beds of ivory for now and focus on the plans of the Lord and working out His salvation in our lives. On one hand you have something fleeting and on the other you have someonething WAY better that is also eternal. I think I'll choose the streets of gold and wait to see how much better the bed must be than ivory.
"Woe to those who lie on beds of ivory and stretch themselves out on their couches, and eat lambs from the flock and calves from the midst of the stall, who sing idle songs to the sound of the harp and like David invent for themselves instruments of music, who drink wine in bowls and anoint themselves with the finest oils, but are not grieved over the ruin of Joseph!" Amos 6:4-6.
Are you grieved over the ruin of our world? Are you grieved because even whole churches and certainly active participants in other places of worship actually abhor God and do not follow His teachings? Are you saddened that people have the option of church and yet do not attend because they see it as hypocritical or they are too "busy" to go? Are we grieved?
We're not so different from the people back in the Old Testament are we? We still overindulge and take our eyes off of the prize. We still sit idly as the world continues to fall into utter darkness. We still do things that bring us temporary comfort because we have never chosen to taste the eternal reward that God holds right in front of us everyday. We are much too easily pleased with the trivial and we settle for momentary happiness that flees as quickly as it came. It flees because it wasn't meant to fill the space we're giving it. It flees because only God can fill that void and yet therein lies the great mystery about why we struggle so indepthly to fight off His reign.
I look at the verses from Amos and I realize we're a whole lot like these people. We want the finest things, we want the nicest meals and richest furniture. We want the big houses and fine living. But does it bring us joy? There's always going to be someone that has more, that's more successful, that's smarter, that's thinks more indepthly, that's more intuitive, that's more fun, that's more cunning, that's prettier, that can outsmart you. There's always going to be someone. But what matters is that which is eternal. The salvation of others matter. It matters much more than gold or silver. Think about it- we long for riches like beds of ivory just as the Israelites but we're going to a place where the streets are paved with gold if we decide to cast aside those beds of ivory for now and focus on the plans of the Lord and working out His salvation in our lives. On one hand you have something fleeting and on the other you have someonething WAY better that is also eternal. I think I'll choose the streets of gold and wait to see how much better the bed must be than ivory.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Secrets
"You only have I known of all the families of the earth; therefore I will punish you for all your iniquities. Do two walk together unless they have agreed to meet? Does a lion roar in the forest when he has no prey? Does a young lion cry out from his den if he has taken nothing? Does a bird fall in a snare on the earth when there is no trap for it? Does a snare spring up from the ground when it has taken nothing? Is a trumpet blown in a city and the people are not afraid? Does disaster come to a city unless the Lord has done it? For the Lord does nothing without revealing His secret to His servants the prophets" Amos 3:2-7.
Reading this passage a few days ago, it struck me, but I wouldn't fully indulge myself into the context and force of its heavy words. Still today I find it difficult to admit to what it says and comply to the entirety I understand it to be. We have no secrets in life that God doesn't know. Every sin or error committed by us is our fault and we should know better. Verse two tells us that the Israelites continue to sin and God in His sovereignty and authority says that He will punish them for everything. "Do two walk together unless they have agree to meet?" Things don't happen by chance, we understand deep down what we get ourselves into and we know ourselves well enough to know what our limits are. So often we test those limits for personal pleasure or indulgence and would rather feel remorse later and ask God's forgiveness on the flip-side than to not put ourselves in the situation in the first place. We love self more than we love others and especially more than we love God.
"Does a bird fall in a snare on the earth when there is no trap for it?" We act surprised when we get into a bind. We act like we think we're immortal and yet we so often are out solely for ourselves and our pleasure. I read an article the other day saying that the average person lies 3 times every 10 minutes. I can think of a zinger or two I've told in the last few days that you find yourself thinking, "oh no, words are coming out of my mouth! why am I saying this to rectify a situation I don't know anything about to make myself seem more important? Why am I always wanting to be right and know everything?" Evil traps are set for us everywhere, particularly as believers. We want to save face after we make a mistake to cover up when maybe the trap was not the mistake but was the urge to lie or act in a certain way that misleads people. Maybe the traps around us are designed to be really enticing and attractive and so we purposely fall into them even though we know the birds end. Will the trap reveal itself and its wicked scheme until it's encompassed you if you get close to it? (5b)--not a chance. Not until you're caught or turn away so fully that the snare awaits a later date to come back and begin its trapping again when it thinks you again weak.
Does anything happen outside of God's knowledge and maybe even God's authority, dominion and actual actions themselves? We so often see God as this great mystery that chooses on a spur of the moment kind of basis what to do next. He says in verse 7, "For the Lord God does nothing without revealing His secret to His servants the prophets." If that's true and we don't have modern day prophets then everything we need to know, all the answers and all the secrets, is contained in the Holy Word of God in its entirety. God may choose to reveal His secrets to you or I in prayer or in reading His Word but how will we know unless we do?
We blaze our own paths in vain.
Reading this passage a few days ago, it struck me, but I wouldn't fully indulge myself into the context and force of its heavy words. Still today I find it difficult to admit to what it says and comply to the entirety I understand it to be. We have no secrets in life that God doesn't know. Every sin or error committed by us is our fault and we should know better. Verse two tells us that the Israelites continue to sin and God in His sovereignty and authority says that He will punish them for everything. "Do two walk together unless they have agree to meet?" Things don't happen by chance, we understand deep down what we get ourselves into and we know ourselves well enough to know what our limits are. So often we test those limits for personal pleasure or indulgence and would rather feel remorse later and ask God's forgiveness on the flip-side than to not put ourselves in the situation in the first place. We love self more than we love others and especially more than we love God.
"Does a bird fall in a snare on the earth when there is no trap for it?" We act surprised when we get into a bind. We act like we think we're immortal and yet we so often are out solely for ourselves and our pleasure. I read an article the other day saying that the average person lies 3 times every 10 minutes. I can think of a zinger or two I've told in the last few days that you find yourself thinking, "oh no, words are coming out of my mouth! why am I saying this to rectify a situation I don't know anything about to make myself seem more important? Why am I always wanting to be right and know everything?" Evil traps are set for us everywhere, particularly as believers. We want to save face after we make a mistake to cover up when maybe the trap was not the mistake but was the urge to lie or act in a certain way that misleads people. Maybe the traps around us are designed to be really enticing and attractive and so we purposely fall into them even though we know the birds end. Will the trap reveal itself and its wicked scheme until it's encompassed you if you get close to it? (5b)--not a chance. Not until you're caught or turn away so fully that the snare awaits a later date to come back and begin its trapping again when it thinks you again weak.
Does anything happen outside of God's knowledge and maybe even God's authority, dominion and actual actions themselves? We so often see God as this great mystery that chooses on a spur of the moment kind of basis what to do next. He says in verse 7, "For the Lord God does nothing without revealing His secret to His servants the prophets." If that's true and we don't have modern day prophets then everything we need to know, all the answers and all the secrets, is contained in the Holy Word of God in its entirety. God may choose to reveal His secrets to you or I in prayer or in reading His Word but how will we know unless we do?
We blaze our own paths in vain.
Friday, February 06, 2009
A Few Stories
A few stories for you...
A friend of mine and I were getting together a few days ago after work. I ran some errands in her area right around the time she was getting off so that we could meet up right after, according to the plan. Almost three hours after our scheduled meet up she calls. Obviously I'm pretty upset by this time, needless to say it's the blood that runs through my veins. However, I found myself during this time of stalling around her area, continuing to think that any minute she'd call, that I had no where else to go. It reminded me of Peter talking with God after the disciples grumbled about a rather taboo topic both then and now. "After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with Him. So Jesus said to the Twelve, 'Do you want to go away as well?' Simon Peter answered Him, 'Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.'" John 6:66-69. I needed her at that moment and was willing to wait as I wish I continually realized my very same need for God.
I heard a great man, a mighty man of our age, speak last week about the rough road of being a disciple, of being a Christian in our culture, and about how often we will have to be completely different than society and its norms. He spoke boldly and unabated, quit a relief from most modern day sympathetic christians. As I walked out of the worship service a guy in the group of people I found myself with commented how utterly boring he found the speaker and a girl agreed with him and continued on about his overly zealous manner and how offensive he sounded to those weak in the faith. I got in my car, as I had thankfully met them there, and instantly needed someone to talk to that understood the great depth of insight and intuition this man had spoken and the great need our society has for more people that relish in the greatness of our God as this man does. It being late at the time therefore counting my family out of the call range I found very few people that I could scroll through my phone and find that could understand the anksed I felt from feeling truly on board with this man yet feeling completely separated and frankly offended by the christian company I resided with that night. "Lord, to whom shall I go? You have the words of eternal life, and I have believed, and come to know that You are the Holy One of God."
I counseled, or maybe I should rather say spoke with, a man yesterday at the Urban Ministry Center that sat down in my office and point blank told me he was going to commit suicide. He had been in and out of mental hospitals for the last few years and had attempted suicide multiple times. When I asked why he was never able to go through with it he said it was because he never had enough resolve to carry it out. He said life wasn't worth living and he was tired. I asked if he knew God. He said Yes. I asked if he read the Bible. He said yes, many time in fact. He said he left it behind when he decided to become homeless, thinking that homelessness would be the last straw and would give him the gumption to kill himself. I said so it wasn't important enough for you to take with you? He said it was like an anchor to him, holding him steady and keeping him fighting and trying to make things work. It was an answer and a way. It was proof of an after life and forced a need to persevere to obtain eternity with God. He said he left it behind so he didn't have to think about it anymore and could end his tired life. "To whom shall we go, you have the words of eternal life?" I told him you can never escape and why do we want to?
Why do we want to...sounds so much easier than it really is, huh? Why do we want to escape from God? Because He is truth and He knows everything about us. If we deal with Him then we have to admit our faults, realize our errors and flee from the sins that frankly we kinda like keeping around. Sure, He's ultimate comfort and fulfillment, but it's an eternal thing and doesn't mean we will instantly ever feel comforted or fulfilled. It's a perseverance battle. It's immediate decisions to go against the popular decision, to stand alone in a crowd, to feel alone in many instances and realizations. It's tough love that many people will not immediately appreciate. It's fighting against our own natures to be what Christ wants and spurs us on to be. It's not letting the desires of the world weigh us down and convince us that we need the same things. Why do we want to run from God like many of Jesus' followers? Because if we cleave to God then we have to run from the world's ways and run from our very nature. But in the end you will find yourself saying along with Peter, "To whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life" because the reward is so much greater than any momentary enjoyment we can find here on earth.
A friend of mine and I were getting together a few days ago after work. I ran some errands in her area right around the time she was getting off so that we could meet up right after, according to the plan. Almost three hours after our scheduled meet up she calls. Obviously I'm pretty upset by this time, needless to say it's the blood that runs through my veins. However, I found myself during this time of stalling around her area, continuing to think that any minute she'd call, that I had no where else to go. It reminded me of Peter talking with God after the disciples grumbled about a rather taboo topic both then and now. "After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with Him. So Jesus said to the Twelve, 'Do you want to go away as well?' Simon Peter answered Him, 'Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.'" John 6:66-69. I needed her at that moment and was willing to wait as I wish I continually realized my very same need for God.
I heard a great man, a mighty man of our age, speak last week about the rough road of being a disciple, of being a Christian in our culture, and about how often we will have to be completely different than society and its norms. He spoke boldly and unabated, quit a relief from most modern day sympathetic christians. As I walked out of the worship service a guy in the group of people I found myself with commented how utterly boring he found the speaker and a girl agreed with him and continued on about his overly zealous manner and how offensive he sounded to those weak in the faith. I got in my car, as I had thankfully met them there, and instantly needed someone to talk to that understood the great depth of insight and intuition this man had spoken and the great need our society has for more people that relish in the greatness of our God as this man does. It being late at the time therefore counting my family out of the call range I found very few people that I could scroll through my phone and find that could understand the anksed I felt from feeling truly on board with this man yet feeling completely separated and frankly offended by the christian company I resided with that night. "Lord, to whom shall I go? You have the words of eternal life, and I have believed, and come to know that You are the Holy One of God."
I counseled, or maybe I should rather say spoke with, a man yesterday at the Urban Ministry Center that sat down in my office and point blank told me he was going to commit suicide. He had been in and out of mental hospitals for the last few years and had attempted suicide multiple times. When I asked why he was never able to go through with it he said it was because he never had enough resolve to carry it out. He said life wasn't worth living and he was tired. I asked if he knew God. He said Yes. I asked if he read the Bible. He said yes, many time in fact. He said he left it behind when he decided to become homeless, thinking that homelessness would be the last straw and would give him the gumption to kill himself. I said so it wasn't important enough for you to take with you? He said it was like an anchor to him, holding him steady and keeping him fighting and trying to make things work. It was an answer and a way. It was proof of an after life and forced a need to persevere to obtain eternity with God. He said he left it behind so he didn't have to think about it anymore and could end his tired life. "To whom shall we go, you have the words of eternal life?" I told him you can never escape and why do we want to?
Why do we want to...sounds so much easier than it really is, huh? Why do we want to escape from God? Because He is truth and He knows everything about us. If we deal with Him then we have to admit our faults, realize our errors and flee from the sins that frankly we kinda like keeping around. Sure, He's ultimate comfort and fulfillment, but it's an eternal thing and doesn't mean we will instantly ever feel comforted or fulfilled. It's a perseverance battle. It's immediate decisions to go against the popular decision, to stand alone in a crowd, to feel alone in many instances and realizations. It's tough love that many people will not immediately appreciate. It's fighting against our own natures to be what Christ wants and spurs us on to be. It's not letting the desires of the world weigh us down and convince us that we need the same things. Why do we want to run from God like many of Jesus' followers? Because if we cleave to God then we have to run from the world's ways and run from our very nature. But in the end you will find yourself saying along with Peter, "To whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life" because the reward is so much greater than any momentary enjoyment we can find here on earth.
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