A Few Stories

A few stories for you...

A friend of mine and I were getting together a few days ago after work. I ran some errands in her area right around the time she was getting off so that we could meet up right after, according to the plan. Almost three hours after our scheduled meet up she calls. Obviously I'm pretty upset by this time, needless to say it's the blood that runs through my veins. However, I found myself during this time of stalling around her area, continuing to think that any minute she'd call, that I had no where else to go. It reminded me of Peter talking with God after the disciples grumbled about a rather taboo topic both then and now. "After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with Him. So Jesus said to the Twelve, 'Do you want to go away as well?' Simon Peter answered Him, 'Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.'" John 6:66-69. I needed her at that moment and was willing to wait as I wish I continually realized my very same need for God.

I heard a great man, a mighty man of our age, speak last week about the rough road of being a disciple, of being a Christian in our culture, and about how often we will have to be completely different than society and its norms. He spoke boldly and unabated, quit a relief from most modern day sympathetic christians. As I walked out of the worship service a guy in the group of people I found myself with commented how utterly boring he found the speaker and a girl agreed with him and continued on about his overly zealous manner and how offensive he sounded to those weak in the faith. I got in my car, as I had thankfully met them there, and instantly needed someone to talk to that understood the great depth of insight and intuition this man had spoken and the great need our society has for more people that relish in the greatness of our God as this man does. It being late at the time therefore counting my family out of the call range I found very few people that I could scroll through my phone and find that could understand the anksed I felt from feeling truly on board with this man yet feeling completely separated and frankly offended by the christian company I resided with that night. "Lord, to whom shall I go? You have the words of eternal life, and I have believed, and come to know that You are the Holy One of God."

I counseled, or maybe I should rather say spoke with, a man yesterday at the Urban Ministry Center that sat down in my office and point blank told me he was going to commit suicide. He had been in and out of mental hospitals for the last few years and had attempted suicide multiple times. When I asked why he was never able to go through with it he said it was because he never had enough resolve to carry it out. He said life wasn't worth living and he was tired. I asked if he knew God. He said Yes. I asked if he read the Bible. He said yes, many time in fact. He said he left it behind when he decided to become homeless, thinking that homelessness would be the last straw and would give him the gumption to kill himself. I said so it wasn't important enough for you to take with you? He said it was like an anchor to him, holding him steady and keeping him fighting and trying to make things work. It was an answer and a way. It was proof of an after life and forced a need to persevere to obtain eternity with God. He said he left it behind so he didn't have to think about it anymore and could end his tired life. "To whom shall we go, you have the words of eternal life?" I told him you can never escape and why do we want to?

Why do we want to...sounds so much easier than it really is, huh? Why do we want to escape from God? Because He is truth and He knows everything about us. If we deal with Him then we have to admit our faults, realize our errors and flee from the sins that frankly we kinda like keeping around. Sure, He's ultimate comfort and fulfillment, but it's an eternal thing and doesn't mean we will instantly ever feel comforted or fulfilled. It's a perseverance battle. It's immediate decisions to go against the popular decision, to stand alone in a crowd, to feel alone in many instances and realizations. It's tough love that many people will not immediately appreciate. It's fighting against our own natures to be what Christ wants and spurs us on to be. It's not letting the desires of the world weigh us down and convince us that we need the same things. Why do we want to run from God like many of Jesus' followers? Because if we cleave to God then we have to run from the world's ways and run from our very nature. But in the end you will find yourself saying along with Peter, "To whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life" because the reward is so much greater than any momentary enjoyment we can find here on earth.