Talk

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that is may give grace to those who hear" Ephesians 4:29.

AHH (that was a yell). Have you ever been talking to someone and slowly gotten very sick of hearing yourself speak? That was yesterday for me. In trying to communicate about a friend's situation to another friend I found myself being very critical and casting hues of gray with my opinion over the situation instead of simply conveying facts and allowing the friend to know and be able to help. There was nothing wrong in itself for telling the story, no confidence broken, no allegiance cut but I do not know why we are so anxious to be critical of other's decisions and lifestyles when it does not build them up and we would not want someone doing it to us.

Ugh. We fill the air with all kinds of words that have no shining quality to even be spoken. I laughed with my friend yesterday when we talked about why girls always have to comment about people right after they leave. It doesn't matter if it's a good or bad comment, but some comment will be made when someone leaves. It's habit- but it's usually a terrible one.

Do my words "give grace" to those who hear? Do my words "build up" my friends and work towards making them better, more consistent and joyful people? Do I justify talking about people because I'm conveying a message to another friend or because 'I need to vent'? We think we have this great right and authority to vent but where does that need come from? Where did it start? Our motive behind venting is to make ourselves feel better, to relieve ourselves from unwanted tension and discontent because things didn't go like we wanted. Things didn't go according to our perfect life plan- that person didn't adore and magnify me like I wanted them to so now I'm mad. I mask it by pointing out their pride, their stubborn nature, their selfishness but those things are masks to the higher problem of my world revolving around me.

We've got to turn ourselves back to Jesus, back to His great sacrifice, back to His mercy so that we can "let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from [us], along with malice [so that we can] be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another as God in Christ forgave [us]" (4:31-32).

The Great Commandment

"Jesus answered, 'The most important is, 'Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, The Lord is one. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength''...And the scribe said to him,'...to love Him with all the heart and with all the understanding and with all the strength...is much more than all whole burnt offerings and sacrifices'" Mark 12:29-33.

The great commandment. How often do I actually follow it? Sure, I think about it, I pray silently in situations that are hard, I listen to Christian music in my car, I read my Bible. But I also consistently let things slide that do not honor God. I often think about how to be a Christian in a non-Christian setting to people who are far from Christ. I often think about when to stick up for God, when to let things go, when to be clear, when to silently pray, when to be righteously angry, when to be understanding, when to do almost everything at all most all times. Maybe one day I'll learn how to truly let Christ be all but for now I'm still trying pretty hard to be perfect like He is.

One of the things that rubs me most wrong is the dozens of times I hear the Lord's name taken in vain daily. I ask myself, 'is this something I should stop a conversation for and ask the person to not say it? Is it worth making things awkward? Would it actually build the kingdom or would it make the doer think I'm an extremist? Am I validating not saying anything because I'm trying to 'accept them for who they are'?' I ask myself these questions all the time. But here's my answer: am I at all times adhering to the greatest commandment to LOVE the Lord with ALL my HEART, MIND and STRENGTH? Am I doing everything possible to love God at all costs?

The greatest commandment is not evangelize, it's not lend a helping hand, it's not make someone feel better about themselves. The 'most important' commandment is to love God with everything we've got, regardless of the consequences. I wonder what our world would look like if Christians loved God at all costs, at all peril to themselves, with all staked on His victory and great plan?

There's no clear cut right answer for every situation. There's no cookie-cutter Christian pat-answer. But what we have is a God that knows what we're going to face and if we only spend time with Him we too will be called conquerors, blameless, victors over a life destined for death. To live life without putting God first is to only half-live. But that decision needs to be made every day, every moment so that God truly would be preeminent.

Ugly

From one of my favorite books comes the quote, "God don't like ugly." I love that quote. I love it every time I think of the harsh reality of my sin. Every time I think of my great depravity. God does not like ugly. He doesn't like it, He doesn't appreciate it. He doesn't tolerate it.

"And He called the people to Him again and said to them, 'Hear me, all of you, and understand: There is nothing outside a person that by going into him can defile him, but the things that come out of a person are what defile him.' And when he had entered the house and left the people, His disciples asked Him about the parable. And he said to them, 'Then are you also without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into a person from the outside cannot defile him, since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled?' And He said, 'What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person'" Mark 7:14-22.

Man, I wish I would have known this passage growing up when I was arguing with my parents about going to see a PG-13 or R rated movie. I could have had some really solid convincing material. . Do we realize the significance of this passage? It struck me yesterday when I read it. We almost always blame exterior circumstances for our sin- we blame bad influences, bad movies, bad situations and bad people. We blame everything else but ourselves when we mess up. While those things spur us on no doubt, do we realize the evil lies within us? Yuck, that's ugly.

I think the passage says many things. One, it says we control how things affect us- do they go straight to our hearts and feed our sinful desire to do a certain thing- are we envious at our core and seeing those people makes us explode? Do I crave compliments to feed my pride? "For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." Do we realize the sins, the emotions, the problems originate in our ugly hearts?

It never occurred to me, no one ever told me I don't think, that the hardest battle I will fight as a Christian is against myself. By nature I'm inclined towards evil. I like doing bad things, I like getting a little ahead in life by telling a mistruth and stepping over someone for my gain. I think I'm pretty special and I have my life very well put-together, thank you. If I just stay away from certain bad influences and people that are terrible anyway, I'll have it made. I can fool people into thinking I'm great.

Wait, step back. That's not what the Christian life is about? Really? Our world sure thinks it is. How sad we as Christians often fight harder to be the people our world dictates as Christian and we don't actually fight to be 'Christ-like'. I'm reading through the Gospels right now and Jesus is very different than our world thinks. He's not quite as nice as I've always pictured Him. He says something interesting earlier in Mark 7, "This people honors me with their lips but their heart is far from me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men."

God don't like ugly. He doesn't like evil, envy, pride or anything else on that list either. Did you see foolishness on there? I think wasting time doing unimportant things falls into that category. ouch, I know. We spend so much time on the things of man, when will we learn? As Americans we work so hard on character, appearances, self-image- when will we work on God-image and stop working on building up ourselves?

Do we realize all those times when we think God is working against us to make our lives miserable and we resent Him for it it's because He is working against us? That's right. He's working against our nature, our very being trying to make us more like Him. If we're trying to be gold, we must let the refiner work the process- and the process hurts, I'll testify.

Knock me down Jesus and build me back up like you.

To Live Above Reproach

I have such an issue with this whole living above reproach concept. I know, I know, it’s in the Bible so Heaven forbid I have a problem with anything. Yes, I do believe God is a ‘my way or the highway’ kind of God (in the most gracious way that phrase can possibly be used), but I also and more importantly believe we need to excavate the area surrounding scripture.

To live above reproach. I’ve always wanted to buck it. Why should I have to change just so that someone else will not think I’m doing something wrong? What if it’s not wrong? I so often take the words verbatim and never consider the life of Christ, never consider Biblical consistency and cohesion, never consider how our world has skewed phrases or pulled out little things and made them disproportionate to how they were intended. This may or may not be such an all-encompassing case, but it holds a valid argument enough for me to get my frustrations off my chest.

“Pilate said to them, ‘Then what shall I do with Jesus, who is called Christ?’ They all said, ‘Let Him be crucified!’ And he said, ‘Why, what evil has He done?’ But they shouted all the more, ‘Let Him be crucified!’” (Matthew 27:22-23). If someone wants to hurt you, they’ll find a way. They didn’t have a valid argument to kill him (“for Pilate knew it was out of envy that they had delivered Him up” v18). They weren’t being logical or rational. WE are not always logical or rational or even sane sometimes. If someone wants you portrayed in a certain light because of whatever motive, they’ll find a way.

“And they took offense at Him” (13:57). The crowd took offense at Jesus because of His wisdom and ability to perform miracles although He was from that same rough, small town they were. You may say that’s ridiculous, but it’s true. He did only good to and for them there, but they took great offense.

So people are going to do all the crazy things they’re going to do and make the crazy assumptions they want to make, so what difference does it all make? I detest the idea of being legalistic. “Teacher, we know that you are true and do not care about anyone’s opinion. For you are not swayed by appearances, but truly teach the way of God” (Mark 12:14a). True and we should live like this. Look at who Jesus was- a friend of tax collectors, prostitutes, drunkards, outcasts. A friend to the friendless, to the unworthy. But if you think about it, He also caught flack from everyone about possibly living a double life due to His close relationship with these people. So what’s the difference? Jesus was above reproach. He hadn’t committed any sin and spent time with these types to communicate the life-giving and freeing power of God. He wasn’t justifying having a little more fun, wasn’t validating His wrong actions, wasn’t feeding his addiction all in the name of do-gooding. Jesus had pure motives.

When Jesus stood before the Sanhedrin, the Jewish Council, plenty of false witnesses tried to come and testify against Him. I bet they said all kinds of things like, “He’s a drunkard” “He’s a liar” “He doesn’t do the things He says He will” “He’s a deceiver and a manipulator”. But none of them were right and so He had no need to defend His way out. I try on different occasions to adhere to this ‘live above reproach’ concept in our world and here’s the conclusion I just drew. To live above reproach is to attempt to live with as much integrity as Christ. To live in such a way that everything we do honors God. Yes, we fail miserably, but the times we fail it’s because we’re trying to honor ourselves by getting farther in life by career, money or friends. To live above reproach is to abide in the Law of God and yet have the abundant freedom offered within its parameters.

I learned a great deal about Christianity over the weekend. I learned that God has a great plan to bring us closer to Himself through the most unlikely means. I learned that God loves to see us having fun as He rejoices in our joy as we acknowledge that fun as glorifying to Him. Jesus was accused of being a drunkard. Jesus was accused of sleeping around. Jesus was accused of being a very rotten person. I think of this ‘live above reproach’ concept and I realize that it’s not always about not going places or being apart of situations because people might think badly of you. It’s always doing things that glorify God so that in those pure motives we can work out our own salvation. Yes, it sometimes can mean abstaining to benefit another, but I think we miss the important part that living above reproach is about living blamelessly so that when the accusations come, as they will, we can stand before God as those called righteous. Those that did not break the Law of God set in place for our benefit. And those who lived with great integrity and freedom because our God loves to see His children exclaiming the satisfaction they find in Him through means some may label differently.

Think through me

"Think through me, thoughts of God,
My Father, quiet me,
Till in Thy holy presence, hushed,
I think Thy thoughts with Thee.

"Think through me, thoughts of God,
That always, everywhere,
The stream that through my being flows
May homeward pass in prayer.

"Think through me, thoughts of God,
And let my own thoughts be
Lost like the sand-pools on the shore
Of the eternal sea."

-Amy Carmichael

Is it I?

I am a lot of things. On different occasions you will find me in different moods, opinionated on different subjects, talkative or quiet, patient or abrupt, happy or sad. If you know me, you know I’m a lot of things. “When it was evening, He reclined at table with the twelve. And as they were eating he said, ‘Truly, I say to you, one of you will betray me.’ And they were very sorrowful and began to say to him one after another, ‘Is it I, Lord?’ He answered, ‘He who has dipped his hand in the dish with me will betray me…Woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed! It would have been better for that man if he had not been born’” (Matthew 26:20-24). I wasn’t there, so I can’t judge for certain, but I don’t think I would have responded as humbly as each disciple. I think I would have been more like Peter when Jesus told him he would deny- “I will never fall away…Even if I must die with you, I will not deny you!” (vs33-35). I have at least that much arrogance to tell Christ He’s wrong to His face and that I know myself better than He knows me. Hmm...I wonder how many times I’ve actually done that?

I look at Matthew’s recount of the story here and I marvel at the humility and sheep-likeness of the disciples. They sit eating with their Great Shepherd. They’re, I’m sure, soaking in every word He’s saying. He astonishes them by admonishing that someone in their close-knit twelve will betray. Here’s what interesting- if they knew anything they knew their own wretchedness. They couldn’t account for others and they dared not point any fingers any place else but towards themselves. They may not have understood what Jesus actually came to earth to do, they clearly did not comprehend all of His ways and teachings, they were not the smartest men by a long shot and Jesus later explains that they will in fact all fall away that very night (“For it is written, ‘I will strike the Shepherd, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered’”). What they understood very plainly was their great depravity in comparison not only to Jesus but also to the way God intended for us to be apart from sin.

Instead of replying, ‘no we would never!’ they realize a few key truths. 1) Jesus is never wrong- If he says it, it happens. 2) They know how weak they are and they realize the accessibility they give evil to creep in and create ruin in their lives. 3) They’ve dealt with people turning away and denying they ever followed- people they probably thought would do great good and then shocked them. 4) They were scared and their master kept telling them He was going to die which partially made sense and partially confused them. They took all their prior knowledge of who Jesus was and everything He’d ever done in their sight or hearing and they realized above all their great depravity compared to the perfect Christ. They knew they could betray, deny Him. Heaven knows our church was built on a pillar that denied three times. Is betrayal so much worse?

I find myself at this stage of life wondering in the very same place as the disciples did then. Is it me, God? Will I betray You? Will I deny You when the going gets tough? Will I shake an angry fist when You don’t give me what I want when I want it? Will I grow tired of waiting on You? Will the knowledge of eternal rest and pure joy with you give me enough strength to hold out no matter what the cost? Is it me? But you know, in our society, we don’t like dwelling on things that don’t paint us very well. It’s so very easy to forget this moment and go on without a true measure of sorrow for our inadequacy as Christ-followers. Is it I, Lord? Will I be able to fight the fight? Here’s the great part- When we finally realize we weren’t meant to be able to fight, we let our weakness, just like the disciples’, make us humble enough so that God can be magnificently strong.

"I want to see!"

“And behold, there were two blind men sitting by the roadside, and when they heard that Jesus was passing by, they cried out, ‘Lord, have mercy on us, Son of David!’ The crowd rebuked them, telling them to be silent, but they cried out all the more, ‘Lord, have mercy on us, Son of David!’ And stopping, Jesus called them and said, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ They said to him, ‘Lord, let our eyes be opened.’ And Jesus in pity touched their eyes and immediately they recovered their sight and followed Him” Matthew 20:29-34.

It makes me sad when I think of all the times I’ve been the crowd telling someone to hush, it’s Jesus, be more respectful. Be more reverent, stop yelling, stop waving you hands, stop dancing. Stop doing things in His presence that might not fit into my box of what Jesus wants. Stop. I bet the crowd was thinking, or at least the people in the crowd like me, “I know more than ya’ll do about this guy. He wants to tell me something wise right now, not heal you. Be quiet. He doesn’t have time for you, He’s helping me. If you would come at Him like I do then maybe you’d get more response.”

But here’s what’s interesting. The men didn’t seem to care. It was to their extreme advantage that they’d probably been persecuted and put down their entire blind existence. They had already learned to cope with people telling them to be quiet and from years of learning to ignore the put downs they continued in their pursuit of the Lord who could heal. I wonder if I have the faith and character to endure years of hardship to help grow me and mature me for one such moment as this? I wonder if I could ever get so far past people’s opinions that I didn’t even blink when it came to deciding between listening to them or getting to Jesus?

Another thing I find interesting is what they requested. “Lord, let our eyes be opened.” Another version says, “Lord, I want to see!” Their blindness altered their entire existence. They knew the great limitations it presented them. Do we know our great depravity from spiritual blindness? Are we willing to push through the crowd to get to Jesus? Are we willing to run down the aisle to reach Him faster? No shortcuts are acceptable, but running shortens the journey. Lord, I want to see. And I’m not willing to take any other healing but full healing. I’m not willing to stop until you have pity on me and I recover my full spiritual sight. Are we that relentless?