The Apostles' Creed Part 2

He descended into hell. Did He? Although only alluded to in scripture, I believe He did this in so many words. What is hell? Life without God. Not life totally void of a god, a supreme being, a ruler and controller. But life without that being. Life spent apart from and unable to reach toward goodness and freedom. Bondage. He descended to our fate, our ultimate end because of our sin that He took on. He not only took on sin but He took on our end, the utmost punishment. Sit in that thought for a second. Can you imagine the torture, the pain that hell must be? We sometimes focus on how horrible it must have been to be beaten and nailed to a cross but that was only a few hours of torture. We're talking days in hell here. He willingly did that for you. He willingly did that for me. The amazing thing is, above all the other amazing things, that He created the world in such a way that He would have to die for us. He created the world not only knowing but making it so that He would have to come down, live among us, teach us His ways and then take our place. He loves us that much.

The third day. 3 days in hell. I can hardly imagine three hours of torture and life without God, much less three days of it. Even as someone not yet saved, the capacity still exists to be so if the said person still exists here on earth. But Jesus endured 3 days of life devoid of any semblance of the comfort, authority and alms that He deserved. I don't even know what else to say- 3 days, that's a long time when you're in pain.

He rose again from the dead. We're conveniently surrounded by people here in the south that know about Jesus. I read a statistic the other day that said 94% of Americans believe in God and 46% are Christian. I think I might a "claim to be" in the later but that's my skepticism talking. Have you ever sat back and thought about what it looked like for Jesus to die and then come back to life? When Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead I believe He made a distinct decision to wait a few days before going there. Jesus wanted Lazarus good and dead. Dead so that he's beginning to smell and rot, leaving no one suspicious that maybe he's just in a comma and looks dead. Now I'm no history buff but I've heard that they used to put bells in caskets because some people got buried alive. They knew this because when they excavated some graves they found fingernail scratchings and other indications that people tried to get out. How terrible would that be? Anyway, that's not the case here. No desperate attempt to look dead or act dead so He could come off the cross. He was dead. They pierced His side, they embalmed him, they set him in a tomb and rolled a really heavy stone over the entrance. But against all odds, against all faith, against everything that made sense to humanity He rose. He, because He is God, picked himself up and decided to live again. He couldn't be beat. We don't know how and the more we try to rationalize it the more it doesn't make sense. Jesus was dead for too long to be considered logical and He not only started to live again but in that moment all blame, all punishment, all pain and torture that we should have endured vanished for those who love Him.

He ascended into heaven. I've always wanted to fly. I think, however, what amazes me most about this picture (can you see it?) is Jesus' humble attitude throughout the scene. I would have been going nuts, I'll be honest, throwing around a few "I told you so's" and "why didn't you believe me, stupid" and "haha I was right". I would at least have wanted to go back to everyone that laughed at me and pointed and laughed at them. But luckily I'm not god. He continued this amazing ability of communicating love and grace to those that still didn't truly understand. He didn't taunt them with His amazing abilities, He hoped they'd realize they could do the same. He hoped they'd do even greater things. He hoped they would draw strength from His strength and seek not themselves but Him and thus get to the Father. He ascended to His rightful place, His place that He never had to leave but chose to leave. He flew to be back in bodily form with a God He never left spiritually.

Being Mad a God

"And they went through the region of Phrygia and Galatia, having been forbidden by the Holy Spirit to speak the word in Asia. And when they had come up to Mysia, they attempted to go into Bithynia, but the Spirit of Jesus did not allow them...And when Paul had seen the vision, immediately we sought to go on into Macedonia, concluding that God had called us to preach the gospel to them" Acts 16:6-7,10.

It doesn't solve anything or do any good to be mad at God. You can try, you can beg and whine, cry, barter and make plenty of other deals with Him, but it won't amount to anything. I was reminded of that fact yesterday as it's somewhat the teeter-totter of my life right now. I read this passage last night right before crawling into bed and it was as though the very heavens opened up and spoke directly to me.

Can you imagine Paul going city to city, proclaiming Jesus, being extremely obedient, fasting, praying, giving everything up; basically being super-human, super-Christian, best all-around guy probably ever? Can you picture it? He's in-touch with God. He's got it. He goes to these regions but the Spirit forbids him speaking. Now this time the Spirit forbids him so this time he probably got the word directly and knew he wasn't supposed to preach in Asia. So that's comforting that he knows close to exactly what's why going, why things are going to the way they are and he's ok with it because it's directly what God wants. But then things change. He goes to the next region, Mysia and attempted to go into Bithynia but the Spirit of Jesus did not allow them. What does that look like? Jesus didn't allow them to go into the city. They were just walking, just trying to do some good, just trying to save some people from eternal damnation and teach them about a risen Savior that could bring them current joy, current satisfaction and hope that nothing else could bring. But Jesus stopped them by whatever means and confounded their path. He didn't appear in a vision and say, "I don't want you going there so I stopped you. Please understand I didn't want to hurt your feelings. I think you're great." Nope, nothing. He just confounded their way and offered no explanation.

But they, Paul, Silas, Timothy and probably others chose to trust God, chose not to get mad or be frustrated that they couldn't enter the town. They chose NOT to doubt in His sovereignty or doubt His plan. They chose to think higher, think wider and believe that God knew the best way. Then Paul had a vision that they should go to Macedonia. It says "immediately WE sought to go..concluding that God had called us to preach the gospel to them." They concluded, they didn't know for sure, they didn't quite get all the answers about why they'd been stopped from entering Bithynia, but they believed in a God who works everything out for good, who has a divine plan that is so much better than our plans, even if our plans seem good or best at the time.

You can get mad at God. You can tell him how things would have worked out so much better if He'd just done this or that. You can sob and whine thinking He doesn't love you, He doesn't care, He doesn't have control. But He does, and He will continue to. So you can stand in God's way and make things more complicated or you can get out of the way and enter into your Macedonia.

Signs and Wonders

“And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance…Now many signs and wonders were regularly done among the people by the hands of the apostles….so that the people even carried out the sick into the streets and laid them on cots and mats, that as Peter came by at least his shadow might fall on some of them…And gazing at Stephen, all who sat in the council saw that his face was like the face of an angel…But he, full of the Holy Spirit, gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God…The Spirit was given through the laying on of the apostles’ hands…An angel of the Lord said to Philip…And when they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord carried Philip away, and the eunuch saw him no more…” Select scripture from Acts 2-8.

I read all of this today from Acts. I got to thinking, mulling over what it must have been like to have lived during this phase. I’m trying to immerse myself in the faith, in the emotion, in the thought-processes that must have been going on at this time. And now I’m wondering what it would be like to have all of these signs and wonders, all of these people and their great faith transplanted into our culture. Picture it- Philip comes up to you while you’re reading something really difficult to grasp from the Bible. You’re confused, perplexed and delighted to find someone so eager to help break the words down for you. He adequately explains the passage; you get so excited about Jesus that you immediately want to be baptized (without the church class). You stop by the side of the road, get out and he dunks you (a non-ordained, uneducated person). Then, if that’s not enough, he’s gone, like gone, gone. The Spirit carries him away.

I find myself thinking how it would go over if someone were carried away by the Spirit in our culture. I think people would be screaming voodoo, witch or something black magic, not ‘neat, the Holy Spirit!’ I think about how many times I’ve needed to literally be two places at one time. I think I’d use this passage as a punch line more than I’m prone to actually attempt to wrap my mind around the circumference, as well as the sincerity and reality of these words. Something like, “Gee, it’d sure be nice to be Philip right now and disappear from one place, landing in the exact spot, the exact time I need to be in the next….” No really, can you imagine it actually happening in our world? Can you imagine an angel speaking directly to someone, telling them to go somewhere particular? Can you picture a man nowadays so powerful and mighty, performing so many signs and wonders that people wanted to touch even his shadow? I think people in 2009 would freak out- and not in a good way. I think most Christians would freak out too.

We say we want a mighty God. We say we want an all powerful deity that reigns supremely. We say we want a God that knows all things, has authority over all things, that makes miracles happen, but do we really? I think one of the saddest things about my generation and the world today is that we don’t spend time sitting in passages like these from acts. We don’t spend time glimpsing what it felt like to be Jesus- to be humiliated for a cause so great. We don’t spend time knowing scripture, figuring it out and unlocking more knowledge and power. We take the cookie cutter Christian life, we take what other people tell us about it, we read the best sellers and we think that’s pretty much all there is to it. We miss out on the authentic Christ, the authentic God, the authentic Spirit and settle for hearsay that truthfully always makes you question whether the bandwagon your on is actually real, is actually going to turn up true. I think it's because sadly a lot of us aren't on the authentic road and therefore that life is coming up short of the awe-inspiring one you thought you might have as a Christian. We've got to read the Bible, we've got to know what's in there so we know what we're getting ourselves into and what God actually exists.

Peter

Peter has always struck me as an interesting character. He's always trying to jump the gun, always so sure in all his actions and speeches. What I like most about Peter is that He wasn't afraid to look stupid in front on Jesus, at least not from my perspective. Take a look-

"Jesus said to them, 'Cast the net on the right side of the boat, and you will find some.' So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in, because of the quantity of fish. That disciple whom Jesus loved therefore said to Peter, 'It is the Lord!' When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on his outer garment, for he was stripped for work, and threw himself into the sea..for they were not far from land, about a hundred yards off" John 21:6-8.

He threw himself into the sea? Can you picture it? John says, "It's Jesus!" and Peter clumsily puts ON his clothes and jumps overboard. It was a hundred yards, a few minutes delay would have kept him dry, but a few minutes he could not spare.He had to get to Jesus. It meant everything to him. Sure, you can say he's trying to make up for denying Christ, trying to show Jesus he's back being a good guy, but I think by now Peter is well aware that Jesus knows the heart instead of the actions. I think Peter genuinely thinks of nothing else but getting to Jesus as quickly as possible, forsaking being cool, looking good and saving face. Peter knew the importance of being near Jesus.

I also thought about Jesus washing the disciples' feet. Look how Peter acts here:

"Jesus came to Simon Peter, who said to Him, 'Lord, do you wash my feet?' Jesus answered him, "What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.' Peter said to Him, 'You shall never wash my feet.' Jesus answered him, 'If I do not wash you, you have no share with me.' Simon Peter said to Him, 'Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!'" 13:6-9.

I love seeing how feisty Peter acts in life. He's a go-getter. He probably needed John and the other disciples to calm him down and make him think realistically about certain situations because he wanted to do something, wanted to take action and make change probably a little faster than was sometimes good. But look here, He comes unashamed to Jesus, asking him questions, wanting to know more. He says, 'are you really going to wash my feet? Shouldn't I be washing yours?' And instead of just following the crowd because everyone else is sitting in awe He says, 'nope, not going to happen. I should be washing yours not you washing mine. You can't do that Jesus, you're no servant, if anything we're your servants.' But Jesus had a lesson or two to teach Peter about true servant hood. When Peter understood that Jesus wanted to serve, wanted to cleanse him of the dirt that so easily clung to him, Peter got over-zealous and said, 'wash all of me!' But yet again, Jesus in all His wisdom says, 'you don't need it, Peter. You are clean everywhere but this one part of you. I'll fix it, I'll make it clean. You just let me, that's your part.' Peter didn't feel dumb because Jesus had to explain it to him. He didn't say, 'oh, well fine,' like our culture of embarrassment when we're wrong. He grasped on tightly to Jesus' words of correction and embraced the new knowledge and wisdom. He embraced Jesus' ability to cleanse and His desire to serve.

When Peter got to the empty tomb He ran directly in. He didn't stop to think if it was safe, if he should be doing that, or if it was best. He was searching for Jesus and logic was out the window. I think I could learn a great deal from the character of Peter. After all, he's the Rock, the great pillar of the church, the guy who died upside down on a cross because he realized just how unworthy he truly was and how fortunate he was to die for such a man that would wash even him of everything he'd ever done.

The Apostle's Creed

In what follows I have written a few thoughts of mine surrounding The Apostle's Creed. I've broken it into two days so stay tuned for part 2!

I believe in God, the Father Almighty, maker of heaven and earth. I believe: the deep cry of our souls so desperately wanting this first eternal statement of the Apostles’ Creed to be true. Not only to be true, but to radiate power, authority, dominion- Almighty-ness. Deep breath. The maker of heaven and earth. How far around that statement can we actually wrap our minds? Do we even scratch the surface of realizing the incomprehensible nature of the breadth and depth of the makings of heaven and earth? The making of such a vast expanse from nothing, not even thin air or dirt. To believe in God, the Father who made all of this by speaking it, although not even necessary in itself. Even the act of speaking things into being could be God’s first application of limiting Himself, or better, arranging Himself in such a way that the human mind might more easily comprehend His workings from the beginning. Limiting not in a sense of boundaries to God, but limiting in a sense of deep, perfect, seamless love that realizes so intricately our make-up, since He is the maker, that it limits its incomprehensibility in order that our fleck-of-sand faith might have a possibility of even catching the hem of his tapestry.

And in Jesus Christ His only Son our Lord. His only son. You and I are not original sons and daughters. We are adopted heirs bought, as in normal adoptive cases, but given the same privileges of the only rightful heir. Privileges to live life the way He lived it. Privileges to put the Father and His creations first before ourselves. Privileges not to try and pay back our adoptive price tag or earn our Father’s favor by deeds of obedience, but privileges that embrace the goodness of God and His abundance because He is our Lord, our Messiah, our Redeemer, our infinite God that made Himself finite that we might be able to inherit Kingdom entry because of our adoption.

Who was conceived by the Holy Ghost, born of the virgin Mary. A young virgin having a baby, unmarried while pregnant. Nothing is impossible with God. Nothing is conventional about God. Those things which make the least sense often emerge as the most powerful. Those things that require faith often become the most profitable.

suffered under Pontius Pilate. Oh Pilate, didn’t want to go against the grain, didn’t want to disengage the crowd and terrified to be a waves maker. Luke says Pilate was “desiring to release Jesus” (23:20) and he “did not find this man guilty of any of the charges against Him” (v14). Pilate, when will we learn the costliness of your mistake? When will we see that following the crowd’s orders and being more afraid of them than God will never make us succeed or be complete? When will we stop seeking others’ affirmation for voids only God can fulfill? He had a life in His hands that He could have sold everything he had, purchased that life, and lived more abundantly from then on than all His riches held. He could have been a follower of the true leader but instead chose to be a leader of a bunch of false followers. He chose appeasement, he chose fame, he chose prosperity and popularity. . I’m fortunate I wasn’t around in Biblical times. So often in daily practice I stand beside Pilate in the same decisions. My name should be right alongside his in this sacred creed. Suffered under me. Suffered because of my sin, my self-righteous actions, my arrogance, my ideals and my desire to be liked. But he suffered not because of me but for me. He suffered under my sin, under my great desire to deviate from His plan, but not because of my great folly. He chose to suffer and willingly entered into it. He may have prayed in the garden, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me” (Luke 22:42), but He knew when He stood at the beginning with the Father (John 1:1-5), that He would in fact have to prove that life He had in Him was and is the light of men by coming here and suffering for crimes He didn’t commit but willingly took upon Himself. He stood at creation and wholeheartedly agreed in unison that all of creation was very good.

was crucified, dead and buried. Would that be the end, some wondered. Others sat crushed, some feeling duped, some feeling saddened He wasn’t the messiah they were looking for. He wasn’t the king who came to take back what the Jews thought rightfully theirs. He wasn’t boisterous, daring and outspoken. He was a soldier, but a much different one that they imagined or truthfully wanted. And now He was dead so did any of it even matter? They knew the prophesy of the Old Testament, they memorized the scriptures for lack of ability to read. They listened at the synagogue with unparalleled attention to each word coming out of any teacher’s mouth. They had heard Jesus say on multiple occasions that on the third day He would rise. But this crucifixion, this dishonoring and disrespectful way of dying was not according to the human plan. It was not how they saw their King riding into victory. They didn’t understand, but they didn’t ask or stop to think that these three harsh words- crucified, dead and buried could come to hold the most glorious tidings for each of us. He truly did turn that which is most horrid, most terrifying and most ugly to most freeing, beautiful and perfect.

Trials

Last night I watched a movie called "One Night with the King." It somewhat accurately follows the journey of Queen Esther and her pursuit to save her people, the Jews. Amidst the unknown circumstances of the fate of their people, a friend of her's wants to escape. She replies, "Perhaps instead of asking questions of our trials, our trials are meant to ask questions of ourselves." What profound words, even if they didn't come directly from Queen Esther's lips. We so often look at hard times and trials longing to escape, longing to be in different circumstances that are happier, more satisfying and with wider ground to stand on. Instead, this quote shows the abundant goodness of our God within trials because they are some of the most defining moments we face. Trials make or break us and both situations can still lead to our good if we let God be God.

Trials remind me when Jesus calmed the storm. "Let us go across to the other side," Jesus said. They didn't hear Him, or at least didn't take it in and hold that statement dear as they felt themselves falling from life when the great storm arose. Did you hear it? Jesus said they were going to get to the other side and yet when the storm arose they all lost their faith in Him and doubted His plan. We're not so different, are we? They run to Jesus in exasperation crying, "Do you not care that we are perishing?" Oh, I look at my life and I wonder how many times I've felt myself falling, felt myself 'perishing,' unable to survive much longer. And all along Jesus is there whispering, "Katie, do you not know that I know? Do you not know that I have a great plan to get you to the other side? Do you not have faith that I will act on my promises and carry you through your entire life? Are you that hard-hearted and cold, are you that deaf, are you that doubtful of my abundance, great mercy and power?"

When Jesus calmed their storm, they were terrified and said, "Who then is this, that even wind and sea obey him?" Do we realize His great power and authority that even the wind and sea obey Him? He's a great God, a God that answers these men when they cried out, even in their lack of faith. What trials do we face that instead of asking "why?" of those hard times we should instead be searching within and seeing what questions of ourselves these times are meant to answer.

Actions

"And when the men had come to Him, they said, 'John the Baptist has sent us to you, saying, 'Are you the one who is to come, or shall we look for another?'' (21) In that hour He healed many people of diseases and plagues and evil spirits, and on many who were blind He bestowed sight. (22) And He answered them, 'Go and tell John what you have seen and heard: the blind receive their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, and the deaf hear, the dead are raised up, the poor have good news preached to them'" (Luke 7:20-22).

I'm really good at being a Christian with words; I'm really bad at being a Christian with actions. As I read this passage last night I thought initially that vs 21 was misplaced. John's disciples asked Jesus a direct question which a simple "yes, I am the one" would have sufficed to John. He could have proved His birth from Mary or His lineage to David. He could have made some prophetic statement about John or said something really holy. Better yet He could have recited an Old Testament prophecy that He was fulfilling and intimidated John's disciples with His overwhelming knowledge so much so that they would just take His response as a "yes I am." But Jesus didn't abide in the world that many of us abide in.

Jesus lived above the need to justify Himself. He lived above satisfaction in worldly affirmation and the need for people to acknowledge His greatness. Jesus lived on a Godly plain in which He sought to do the Will of the Father by being Holy, being just, being loving, being righteous, not just saying holy, just, loving and righteous things. Jesus lived what He taught. In the passage, right after John's disciples asked Jesus if He was the one, Jesus healed. I can picture the scene now: They ask him a question, He looks at the them tenderheartedly, and then turns to go about His work- nothing out of the ordinary, nothing special on that particular day. No longing in Him to prove Himself or any extra effort because these were important people that He needed to impress. None of that. He simple turns and loves people by relieving them of their ailments. He heals their bodies hoping that they would see also His ability to heal their souls- healing of far greater value.

I'm sure in that moment that Jesus turns from their question to go about His work the disciples looked puzzlingly at Him thinking, "Dude, we've come a long way and if you could just answer the question so that we can get back and go about our work that would be great." (sure, they thought it respectfully in case this was the Christ!) Then they stood back in amazement as Jesus answers in His actions. He performs miracles they'd never seen before and loved people in such a mighty way that it left them positive He was the Christ.

I wonder if people know I'm a Christ-follower by my actions and not just my speech? Particularly in the secular working world, most of our Christian communication comes through our business practices, our integrity in our work, our handlings and investment in the people we spend 40+ hours a week working with. I wonder if they know I'm a believer by my body language and my work ethic? I wonder how much time I invest in 'the least of these' and not just the people that can help me. I wonder how much Kingdom building I do everyday and not "katie-building." Jesus spoke by His actions and then His speech. What will we be known by or will we be known at all?

Talk

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that is may give grace to those who hear" Ephesians 4:29.

AHH (that was a yell). Have you ever been talking to someone and slowly gotten very sick of hearing yourself speak? That was yesterday for me. In trying to communicate about a friend's situation to another friend I found myself being very critical and casting hues of gray with my opinion over the situation instead of simply conveying facts and allowing the friend to know and be able to help. There was nothing wrong in itself for telling the story, no confidence broken, no allegiance cut but I do not know why we are so anxious to be critical of other's decisions and lifestyles when it does not build them up and we would not want someone doing it to us.

Ugh. We fill the air with all kinds of words that have no shining quality to even be spoken. I laughed with my friend yesterday when we talked about why girls always have to comment about people right after they leave. It doesn't matter if it's a good or bad comment, but some comment will be made when someone leaves. It's habit- but it's usually a terrible one.

Do my words "give grace" to those who hear? Do my words "build up" my friends and work towards making them better, more consistent and joyful people? Do I justify talking about people because I'm conveying a message to another friend or because 'I need to vent'? We think we have this great right and authority to vent but where does that need come from? Where did it start? Our motive behind venting is to make ourselves feel better, to relieve ourselves from unwanted tension and discontent because things didn't go like we wanted. Things didn't go according to our perfect life plan- that person didn't adore and magnify me like I wanted them to so now I'm mad. I mask it by pointing out their pride, their stubborn nature, their selfishness but those things are masks to the higher problem of my world revolving around me.

We've got to turn ourselves back to Jesus, back to His great sacrifice, back to His mercy so that we can "let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from [us], along with malice [so that we can] be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another as God in Christ forgave [us]" (4:31-32).

The Great Commandment

"Jesus answered, 'The most important is, 'Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, The Lord is one. And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength''...And the scribe said to him,'...to love Him with all the heart and with all the understanding and with all the strength...is much more than all whole burnt offerings and sacrifices'" Mark 12:29-33.

The great commandment. How often do I actually follow it? Sure, I think about it, I pray silently in situations that are hard, I listen to Christian music in my car, I read my Bible. But I also consistently let things slide that do not honor God. I often think about how to be a Christian in a non-Christian setting to people who are far from Christ. I often think about when to stick up for God, when to let things go, when to be clear, when to silently pray, when to be righteously angry, when to be understanding, when to do almost everything at all most all times. Maybe one day I'll learn how to truly let Christ be all but for now I'm still trying pretty hard to be perfect like He is.

One of the things that rubs me most wrong is the dozens of times I hear the Lord's name taken in vain daily. I ask myself, 'is this something I should stop a conversation for and ask the person to not say it? Is it worth making things awkward? Would it actually build the kingdom or would it make the doer think I'm an extremist? Am I validating not saying anything because I'm trying to 'accept them for who they are'?' I ask myself these questions all the time. But here's my answer: am I at all times adhering to the greatest commandment to LOVE the Lord with ALL my HEART, MIND and STRENGTH? Am I doing everything possible to love God at all costs?

The greatest commandment is not evangelize, it's not lend a helping hand, it's not make someone feel better about themselves. The 'most important' commandment is to love God with everything we've got, regardless of the consequences. I wonder what our world would look like if Christians loved God at all costs, at all peril to themselves, with all staked on His victory and great plan?

There's no clear cut right answer for every situation. There's no cookie-cutter Christian pat-answer. But what we have is a God that knows what we're going to face and if we only spend time with Him we too will be called conquerors, blameless, victors over a life destined for death. To live life without putting God first is to only half-live. But that decision needs to be made every day, every moment so that God truly would be preeminent.

Ugly

From one of my favorite books comes the quote, "God don't like ugly." I love that quote. I love it every time I think of the harsh reality of my sin. Every time I think of my great depravity. God does not like ugly. He doesn't like it, He doesn't appreciate it. He doesn't tolerate it.

"And He called the people to Him again and said to them, 'Hear me, all of you, and understand: There is nothing outside a person that by going into him can defile him, but the things that come out of a person are what defile him.' And when he had entered the house and left the people, His disciples asked Him about the parable. And he said to them, 'Then are you also without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into a person from the outside cannot defile him, since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled?' And He said, 'What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person'" Mark 7:14-22.

Man, I wish I would have known this passage growing up when I was arguing with my parents about going to see a PG-13 or R rated movie. I could have had some really solid convincing material. . Do we realize the significance of this passage? It struck me yesterday when I read it. We almost always blame exterior circumstances for our sin- we blame bad influences, bad movies, bad situations and bad people. We blame everything else but ourselves when we mess up. While those things spur us on no doubt, do we realize the evil lies within us? Yuck, that's ugly.

I think the passage says many things. One, it says we control how things affect us- do they go straight to our hearts and feed our sinful desire to do a certain thing- are we envious at our core and seeing those people makes us explode? Do I crave compliments to feed my pride? "For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." Do we realize the sins, the emotions, the problems originate in our ugly hearts?

It never occurred to me, no one ever told me I don't think, that the hardest battle I will fight as a Christian is against myself. By nature I'm inclined towards evil. I like doing bad things, I like getting a little ahead in life by telling a mistruth and stepping over someone for my gain. I think I'm pretty special and I have my life very well put-together, thank you. If I just stay away from certain bad influences and people that are terrible anyway, I'll have it made. I can fool people into thinking I'm great.

Wait, step back. That's not what the Christian life is about? Really? Our world sure thinks it is. How sad we as Christians often fight harder to be the people our world dictates as Christian and we don't actually fight to be 'Christ-like'. I'm reading through the Gospels right now and Jesus is very different than our world thinks. He's not quite as nice as I've always pictured Him. He says something interesting earlier in Mark 7, "This people honors me with their lips but their heart is far from me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men."

God don't like ugly. He doesn't like evil, envy, pride or anything else on that list either. Did you see foolishness on there? I think wasting time doing unimportant things falls into that category. ouch, I know. We spend so much time on the things of man, when will we learn? As Americans we work so hard on character, appearances, self-image- when will we work on God-image and stop working on building up ourselves?

Do we realize all those times when we think God is working against us to make our lives miserable and we resent Him for it it's because He is working against us? That's right. He's working against our nature, our very being trying to make us more like Him. If we're trying to be gold, we must let the refiner work the process- and the process hurts, I'll testify.

Knock me down Jesus and build me back up like you.

To Live Above Reproach

I have such an issue with this whole living above reproach concept. I know, I know, it’s in the Bible so Heaven forbid I have a problem with anything. Yes, I do believe God is a ‘my way or the highway’ kind of God (in the most gracious way that phrase can possibly be used), but I also and more importantly believe we need to excavate the area surrounding scripture.

To live above reproach. I’ve always wanted to buck it. Why should I have to change just so that someone else will not think I’m doing something wrong? What if it’s not wrong? I so often take the words verbatim and never consider the life of Christ, never consider Biblical consistency and cohesion, never consider how our world has skewed phrases or pulled out little things and made them disproportionate to how they were intended. This may or may not be such an all-encompassing case, but it holds a valid argument enough for me to get my frustrations off my chest.

“Pilate said to them, ‘Then what shall I do with Jesus, who is called Christ?’ They all said, ‘Let Him be crucified!’ And he said, ‘Why, what evil has He done?’ But they shouted all the more, ‘Let Him be crucified!’” (Matthew 27:22-23). If someone wants to hurt you, they’ll find a way. They didn’t have a valid argument to kill him (“for Pilate knew it was out of envy that they had delivered Him up” v18). They weren’t being logical or rational. WE are not always logical or rational or even sane sometimes. If someone wants you portrayed in a certain light because of whatever motive, they’ll find a way.

“And they took offense at Him” (13:57). The crowd took offense at Jesus because of His wisdom and ability to perform miracles although He was from that same rough, small town they were. You may say that’s ridiculous, but it’s true. He did only good to and for them there, but they took great offense.

So people are going to do all the crazy things they’re going to do and make the crazy assumptions they want to make, so what difference does it all make? I detest the idea of being legalistic. “Teacher, we know that you are true and do not care about anyone’s opinion. For you are not swayed by appearances, but truly teach the way of God” (Mark 12:14a). True and we should live like this. Look at who Jesus was- a friend of tax collectors, prostitutes, drunkards, outcasts. A friend to the friendless, to the unworthy. But if you think about it, He also caught flack from everyone about possibly living a double life due to His close relationship with these people. So what’s the difference? Jesus was above reproach. He hadn’t committed any sin and spent time with these types to communicate the life-giving and freeing power of God. He wasn’t justifying having a little more fun, wasn’t validating His wrong actions, wasn’t feeding his addiction all in the name of do-gooding. Jesus had pure motives.

When Jesus stood before the Sanhedrin, the Jewish Council, plenty of false witnesses tried to come and testify against Him. I bet they said all kinds of things like, “He’s a drunkard” “He’s a liar” “He doesn’t do the things He says He will” “He’s a deceiver and a manipulator”. But none of them were right and so He had no need to defend His way out. I try on different occasions to adhere to this ‘live above reproach’ concept in our world and here’s the conclusion I just drew. To live above reproach is to attempt to live with as much integrity as Christ. To live in such a way that everything we do honors God. Yes, we fail miserably, but the times we fail it’s because we’re trying to honor ourselves by getting farther in life by career, money or friends. To live above reproach is to abide in the Law of God and yet have the abundant freedom offered within its parameters.

I learned a great deal about Christianity over the weekend. I learned that God has a great plan to bring us closer to Himself through the most unlikely means. I learned that God loves to see us having fun as He rejoices in our joy as we acknowledge that fun as glorifying to Him. Jesus was accused of being a drunkard. Jesus was accused of sleeping around. Jesus was accused of being a very rotten person. I think of this ‘live above reproach’ concept and I realize that it’s not always about not going places or being apart of situations because people might think badly of you. It’s always doing things that glorify God so that in those pure motives we can work out our own salvation. Yes, it sometimes can mean abstaining to benefit another, but I think we miss the important part that living above reproach is about living blamelessly so that when the accusations come, as they will, we can stand before God as those called righteous. Those that did not break the Law of God set in place for our benefit. And those who lived with great integrity and freedom because our God loves to see His children exclaiming the satisfaction they find in Him through means some may label differently.

Think through me

"Think through me, thoughts of God,
My Father, quiet me,
Till in Thy holy presence, hushed,
I think Thy thoughts with Thee.

"Think through me, thoughts of God,
That always, everywhere,
The stream that through my being flows
May homeward pass in prayer.

"Think through me, thoughts of God,
And let my own thoughts be
Lost like the sand-pools on the shore
Of the eternal sea."

-Amy Carmichael

Is it I?

I am a lot of things. On different occasions you will find me in different moods, opinionated on different subjects, talkative or quiet, patient or abrupt, happy or sad. If you know me, you know I’m a lot of things. “When it was evening, He reclined at table with the twelve. And as they were eating he said, ‘Truly, I say to you, one of you will betray me.’ And they were very sorrowful and began to say to him one after another, ‘Is it I, Lord?’ He answered, ‘He who has dipped his hand in the dish with me will betray me…Woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed! It would have been better for that man if he had not been born’” (Matthew 26:20-24). I wasn’t there, so I can’t judge for certain, but I don’t think I would have responded as humbly as each disciple. I think I would have been more like Peter when Jesus told him he would deny- “I will never fall away…Even if I must die with you, I will not deny you!” (vs33-35). I have at least that much arrogance to tell Christ He’s wrong to His face and that I know myself better than He knows me. Hmm...I wonder how many times I’ve actually done that?

I look at Matthew’s recount of the story here and I marvel at the humility and sheep-likeness of the disciples. They sit eating with their Great Shepherd. They’re, I’m sure, soaking in every word He’s saying. He astonishes them by admonishing that someone in their close-knit twelve will betray. Here’s what interesting- if they knew anything they knew their own wretchedness. They couldn’t account for others and they dared not point any fingers any place else but towards themselves. They may not have understood what Jesus actually came to earth to do, they clearly did not comprehend all of His ways and teachings, they were not the smartest men by a long shot and Jesus later explains that they will in fact all fall away that very night (“For it is written, ‘I will strike the Shepherd, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered’”). What they understood very plainly was their great depravity in comparison not only to Jesus but also to the way God intended for us to be apart from sin.

Instead of replying, ‘no we would never!’ they realize a few key truths. 1) Jesus is never wrong- If he says it, it happens. 2) They know how weak they are and they realize the accessibility they give evil to creep in and create ruin in their lives. 3) They’ve dealt with people turning away and denying they ever followed- people they probably thought would do great good and then shocked them. 4) They were scared and their master kept telling them He was going to die which partially made sense and partially confused them. They took all their prior knowledge of who Jesus was and everything He’d ever done in their sight or hearing and they realized above all their great depravity compared to the perfect Christ. They knew they could betray, deny Him. Heaven knows our church was built on a pillar that denied three times. Is betrayal so much worse?

I find myself at this stage of life wondering in the very same place as the disciples did then. Is it me, God? Will I betray You? Will I deny You when the going gets tough? Will I shake an angry fist when You don’t give me what I want when I want it? Will I grow tired of waiting on You? Will the knowledge of eternal rest and pure joy with you give me enough strength to hold out no matter what the cost? Is it me? But you know, in our society, we don’t like dwelling on things that don’t paint us very well. It’s so very easy to forget this moment and go on without a true measure of sorrow for our inadequacy as Christ-followers. Is it I, Lord? Will I be able to fight the fight? Here’s the great part- When we finally realize we weren’t meant to be able to fight, we let our weakness, just like the disciples’, make us humble enough so that God can be magnificently strong.

"I want to see!"

“And behold, there were two blind men sitting by the roadside, and when they heard that Jesus was passing by, they cried out, ‘Lord, have mercy on us, Son of David!’ The crowd rebuked them, telling them to be silent, but they cried out all the more, ‘Lord, have mercy on us, Son of David!’ And stopping, Jesus called them and said, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ They said to him, ‘Lord, let our eyes be opened.’ And Jesus in pity touched their eyes and immediately they recovered their sight and followed Him” Matthew 20:29-34.

It makes me sad when I think of all the times I’ve been the crowd telling someone to hush, it’s Jesus, be more respectful. Be more reverent, stop yelling, stop waving you hands, stop dancing. Stop doing things in His presence that might not fit into my box of what Jesus wants. Stop. I bet the crowd was thinking, or at least the people in the crowd like me, “I know more than ya’ll do about this guy. He wants to tell me something wise right now, not heal you. Be quiet. He doesn’t have time for you, He’s helping me. If you would come at Him like I do then maybe you’d get more response.”

But here’s what’s interesting. The men didn’t seem to care. It was to their extreme advantage that they’d probably been persecuted and put down their entire blind existence. They had already learned to cope with people telling them to be quiet and from years of learning to ignore the put downs they continued in their pursuit of the Lord who could heal. I wonder if I have the faith and character to endure years of hardship to help grow me and mature me for one such moment as this? I wonder if I could ever get so far past people’s opinions that I didn’t even blink when it came to deciding between listening to them or getting to Jesus?

Another thing I find interesting is what they requested. “Lord, let our eyes be opened.” Another version says, “Lord, I want to see!” Their blindness altered their entire existence. They knew the great limitations it presented them. Do we know our great depravity from spiritual blindness? Are we willing to push through the crowd to get to Jesus? Are we willing to run down the aisle to reach Him faster? No shortcuts are acceptable, but running shortens the journey. Lord, I want to see. And I’m not willing to take any other healing but full healing. I’m not willing to stop until you have pity on me and I recover my full spiritual sight. Are we that relentless?

Two things I ask

What’s it like to truly ‘live in the moment’? What’s it like to depend on God for every mouthful, every drink, every night of sheltered sleep? What’s it like to constantly depend on God for food and shelter? What’s it like to be needy? Some of us are 'blessed' enough that we've never personally known the answers to these questions.

“Two things I ask of you: deny them not to me before I die: Remove far from me falsehood and lying; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the food that is needful for me, lest I be full and deny you and say, ‘Who is the Lord?’ or lest I be poor and steal and profane the name of my God” Proverbs 30:7-9.

This passage goes against every middle class value I’ve ever been taught. Well, I take it back. It by no means contradicts my acquired values, it merely emphasizes principles that I would never wish upon myself if I were being totally honest. I’m sorry God; did you say possibly no savings account? Did you really mean maybe no ownership of a house, ever? Did you mean it that I might not ever feel full when I’m eating and I may not know where or when my next meal may occur? Did you mean it that I can’t sometimes plan for the future or even know what tomorrow might bring for me?

Seriously now, this is my life we’re talking about. I’ve got to have some plan, some system, some routine. I’ve got to. I’ve always had it. I like my neat little life, my savings, my 5-year plan, making more money than I need, eating more than I should, exercising less than I should, sleeping a lot, getting my way, feeling safe and secure. I like my neat little tidy life. I don’t love some things, some big things, but I like knowing my future is set and my financial life is secure. I’d like to make way more money actually, who wouldn’t? God, are you telling me that all these things might be harmful to me instead of good like I’ve always seen them?

Things in themselves are for the most part not bad or evil. They are inanimate and therefore do not hold a specific bad purpose on purpose. But when we allow them to dictate our lives, when we begin to see them before we see God, when we begin to use them as crutches, as security, as any place that the Lord is meant to fill, then they become harmful and destructive to us. God often shows us just how unnecessary they are for our eternal survival; Heaven knows He’s done it to thousands in this current recession. Poof, 401k gone. Stock, see ya, bye. Job, business-budget cut and that someone that had to go was you. 10-year plan out the window. The idea of even going out to dinner becomes unimaginable for many right now. But here’s the interesting thing and the point: It’s not a sign of failure to have all these earthly possessions drained from you.  On the contrary, we might even should ask for it. That’s right, I said it. If anything is keeping us from utter dependence on God, anything that makes us even for a moment forget the Lordship of God then it is making us full- it’s filling a place that only God is meant to fill and it needs to be revamped. It may not need to be cut out, but it needs to be altered

Let me put these verses in context for a second. This is Solomon who wrote this- the most, or filling one of the top slots at least, wealthy person that will EVER live. I wonder what it would be like to live like Solomon is describing. If he of all people is making a comment such as this then surely all of the rest of us should listen. If someone so wealthy, so put together, someone who has anything he could possibly want in the whole world is saying that he’d rather live moment to moment and have God provide everything, then maybe we should listen up. Maybe we should trust God’s provisions a lot more and love the world’s a lot less. I wonder what it would look like to truly realize that money is just paper and we should use enough to survive and be willing to give the rest away? Solomon got it, when will the rest of us catch the boat? Lord, don’t even make me full, lest I forget you. This is a man that knows his limitations and made provisions with God against them- What are you doing about yours?

Return

"So you by the help of your God, return, hold fast to love and justice, and wait continually for your God....But I am the Lord your God from the land of Egypt; you know no God but me, and besides me there is no savior. It was I who knew you in the wilderness, in the land of drought; but when they had grazed, they became full, they were filled up, and their heart was lifted up; therefore they forgot me." Hosea 12:6; 13:4-6

Are we capable of realizing our need for God when things are good? We often hate the bad times, the times when we have a big fight with someone, the times we lose a job, the times we don't have enough money to pay the bills, the times of illness, the times of loss..the list goes on and on. We hate those times mainly. We ache inside and long to be rid of the constant strain in puts on us. We lose sleep, we cry, we are easily agitated and yet we find ourselves praying more. We do so, sadly, because God's our last resort, our only remaining line of defense (or at least we hope we're still defensible). We pray to the God of Heaven and hope that He hears (which He always does). We pray and hesitantly think something may happen, but who knows.

In my limited experience, prayer is meant to not only change situations but it's meant to change us. It's meant to search out all the grievous ways in us, all the yucky pride and contempt, and it's meant to transform us to more of the likeness of Christ. All too often, however, we only want out situation to change, not us. We fight against the very answer God is trying to give us when we pray. Look at the passage. There is no savior besides God in Jesus. None. We can't save ourselves, we can't erase bad things we've done, we can't take bad judgment calls back, but we can be completely forgiven in Christ. We can walk through our wilderness, our land of drought, our hard times, with God and allow Him to lead and guide us. Not to necessarily get us out of the wilderness but to be fed there, to survive there sometimes, even if for just a season, and learn that He truly is our Savior and Lord.

The sad thing about our great depravity is that we become full and we turn away from God. We want to be full, we pray to be full during the drought but when we reach it we go our separate way because now 'we've got it all on our own'. I'm learning that sometimes the drought, sometimes the hard situations are the best places to be in. Not because we want to bask in our mistakes, our short-comings, our ways that keep us from a perfect relationship with Christ, but because in our moments of weakness Christ can be presented strong. Christ can be in our lives what He came to be, our Savior.

Rejoice in your weakness, for in it is your key to life everlasting as a great sinner who has a great Lord.

Miracles

I often think that if I could only see Jesus, if I could only watch Him perform a miracle, if I could only touch His holes and observe His perfection then I would follow Him whole-heartedly and never stray. I often think I could survive fully on Him if I could do all these things and never need another explanation or experience another 'if only' moment- I would have full faith. But interestingly enough, that wouldn't be the case. "Then Jesus began to denounce the cities where most of His mighty works had been done, because they did not repent" Matthew 11:20. Idiots. It's amazing to me that they could see Jesus restore a sick girl's life, make 2 blind men see, cast out demons, clean lepers, rebuke the winds and the sea and who knows what else and yet they still did not repent. And as amazing as it is, I'm forced to sit back and view my own life and shudder at the many times that I've experienced God and still react in much the same way as those lost souls. I've seen God stop a car so that it didn't run me over in Africa, I've had an attempted robbery that I walked away unharmed, I've watched the power of prayer daily and marveled that God would reach down and care about such small matters. Even in all His miracles that He's performed right in front of my eyes, I still can't gather myself to follow perfectly in His footsteps.

We need to take very seriously all the times we've experienced God. We're accountable to those moments. I think we forget in just how many ways God is great because evil tries to wipe it from our memory. If deception is one Evil's greatest tools, then I think one of the main objectives is simply for us to forget the goodness of God. I once had a friend tell me that every night before she goes to bed she writes down 5 ways God was good that day and 5 good things about her life. It's not such a bad idea if that's what it takes to make us remember the goodness of God, remember the great deeds He performs in our lives every day.

Going to Heaven

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the Kingdom of Heaven, but the one who does the will of My Father who is in Heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness’” Matthew 7:21-23.

Most people, particularly Christians, wonder at some point in their lives if they are truly saved. We all think we’ve trusted in Jesus as our Lord and Savior; we’ve tried to follow in His ways; we’ve strove to love other people and do good things. We actually sometimes even pat ourselves on the back and think of the good deeds we’ve performed, but are we really saved? Are we really washed in the blood of the lamb or just in the water?

I love this passage in The Scriptures because I think it lays our saving foundation so well. Jesus answers our questions and clears our doubts about salvation all in the guise of pointing out those that are not. He shows His point in three ways (and maybe more!): 1) saying “Lord, Lord” to Jesus 2) Doing the Will of the Father 3) Being Lawful.

The first requirement for going to Heaven is believing in Jesus Christ as Lord. Jesus says that not everyone who does this will enter Heaven; thereby we are able to assume that the opposite is true that if you don’t do it you surely will not enter Heaven. Jesus is Lord and Savior of this world that we live in and He came down as 100% God and 100% man to be able to pay the price for our weakness and inability. We must call Him Lord to receive that great gift that covers our depravity.

The second requirement for going to Heaven is doing the Will of the Father. That Will can be found in the Bible as well as revealed in our prayer, fasting and meditation times (and all the other times the Spirit is with us...). To do the will of the Father is a very difficult thing but praise Jesus that by calling Him ‘Lord’ we are able to fall back on Him each time we fail and know that we are righteous in our pursuit of the Will of God because we first call Jesus “Lord”. That pursuit of the Will of God is just as key to our salvation as calling Jesus “Lord,” which in my opinion is where many people miss the boat.

The last point I see Jesus referring to in this passage shows His rebuke of lawlessness. Jesus says that one day He will exclaim, “Depart from me you workers of lawlessness” to those whom He never knew. So in order for us to be known by God and be called as His child we must be lawFULL people. We must obey the law of the Lord and not stray from Him. Now here again we fall into the grace of first calling Jesus Lord and therefore being able to stumble along our path of being lawful. It’s the same as following the Will of the Father for your life in that it’s the pursuit of the law and your determination to do so victoriously instead of the actual outcomes of each attempt. Yes, we will fail. The good Lord knows just how many times we will fail each and every day. Our attention and willingness to adhere to EACH law presented by our good God determines our ability to be lawful or lawless. Here again many people miss the bandwagon (or should I say many people jump ON the bandwagon and therefore jump OUT of lawfulness?). We pick and choose which rules and regulations we will and will not adhere to. We take some very seriously and others as things that don’t matter if we break. It’s not right if you think about it and completely unbiblical to do so. I think we would adjust some of our ‘fun’ and amusement in life if we acknowledge the weight of our lawlessness many times in those situations.

Do you realize that by blatantly committing sin you are being lawless, therefore violating a prerequisite for eternal life? Do you realize that following your own path counteracts the better path of God, therefore violating a prerequisite for eternal life? Do you realize that using the Lord’s name in vain is showing your lack of knowledge of the power of that name therefore violating a prerequisite for eternal life? Thank the good Lord that His blood cleanses even the caked on mess we make of our sins and violations of God’s law. Don’t let these last questions send you back into a tail spin of wondering if you’re saved. Let the first part make your path certain and these last questions make you realize the serious nature of each decision, each choice, each step in any direction. It’s really easy to make the right decision when it’s going to get you something good or bump you up in life. It’s really difficult to make the right decision when you might get away without anyone knowing or it will cost you something great.

The Lord IS working

"O Lord, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not hear? Or cry to you, 'violence!' and you will not save? Why do you make me see iniquity, and why do you idly look at wrong? Destruction and violence are before me; strife and contention arise. So the law is paralyzed, and justice never goes forth. For the wicked surround the righteous; so justice goes forth perverted" Habakkuk 1:2-4.

Have you ever felt like this? I think I can successfully vouch for just about every person I've ever shared life with that we've all had our moments. We've all wanted to shout at God and ask, "Where are you?!?!" We've all wondered as if to say that our plan is better than God's as we shake an angry fist at the perfect Planner of the universe. We have this lase fair version of God as though He's the guy that lazily sits on His magnificent throne up in heaven going in and out of slumber watching idly as we destroy ourselves and everything around us.

But, you say, there are all these terrible people who get great jobs, get spouses they don't deserve, have the ability to do just about anything in life they want and to top it all off everyone loves them and wants to be like them. It's not fair. You say, here you are trying to follow God and you aren't getting the things you signed up for. You want the job, the money, the admiration....really? Is that what's going to make you happy?...Are you sure?

I think we have eyes that are too nearsighted. We see the immediate and grasp for it when the eternal reward of waiting is of so much more value. I think God is working in the midst of us and we either choose to not recognize the work as God or we want something else are so turn disdainfully at Him to hold a grudge. God says, "Look among the nations, and see; wonder and be astounded. For I AM doing a work in your days that you would not believe if told" vs5. God is working. God is doing great things in our generation. God is the same God that called down fire and hail to help His people. He's the same God that brought plagues to get His people out of harm, the same God that kept Jonah safe in the fish. He's the same God that will never leave us or forsake us. But, He's God and we're not. "If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay" 2:3b. We have a very jaded timeline when it comes to waiting. God has an eternal timeline.

"Let all the earth keep silence before the Lord" vs20b. Maybe the next time you're wrestling with God over your timeline and over your immediate 'need' for some big issue, take a second and realize that He's God. He's an active, aggressive, passionate, loving and powerful Father that is in all things, knows all things and provides all things. Maybe instead of bombarding the gates of heaven with all your requests, sit back and keep silent before the Lord. Either way, He'll sustain you, but I bet the fastest way to conform to the image of God is to wait patiently for Him and keep silent in His presence and know that He IS working, that He IS moving, and He IS doing great things that we wouldn't even believe if told.

Singlehood

Our world doesn’t respond well to singles. Let me repeat that, in my opinion, our world responds incorrectly to singles. By ‘our world’ I mean this sudo-Christian, southern comfort, moralistic society that most of us have been brought up in and that we don’t truly realize the magnitude of influence it has over us and the strength it carries to which we live our lives by. Singlehood, in our society, is viewed as a waiting period; a period when we’re trying to figure out what we want and how we’re going to get there; a place of uncertainty where a person continues to move around and switch jobs because they aren’t ready to settle down- singlehood. Mainly though, it’s a place that people feel sorry for you because you haven’t found your one true love that we’re all so convinced will make everything so much better and make our world and future so much more certain. GAG. Ok, so now you’re either thinking, “yeah, she feels that way because she’s young and doesn’t know any better” or “now Katie marriage isn’t all roses” or better yet “everyone needs that time to find themselves”. BOO. We have popularized and idolized marriage as though it’s the crowning victory to our earthly lives. Ok, ok, thus says the cynic, right? Thus says the single girl who’s trying to cope with the fact that she doesn’t have anyone and is lonely you say. You can say whatever you please, but the truth is that our world idealizes marriage. We put life into phases: childhood, the dreaded teenage years (remember that mom?), college with a little sowing of your wild oats and then a short phase of singlehood along with young professionalism and then marriage. You’ve made it. People will take you seriously, they will assume you’re mature, they will invite you over for dinner, and they will speak to you like an adult. However, if you’re still single then you’re still trying to figure things out and just need a little more time so they’ll politely comply for you to grow up.

Our world doesn’t respond well to singles. We have singles Sunday school classes that the whole point is for the sexes to meet one another, start a relationship and get married. We want married couples, we want families, we want generations. We’re scared of single people. We either don’t believe they have enough self-confidence and faith in God to be single or we think them too volatile to be put in any sort of important position. After all, they’re still looking for themselves. Even those in unhappy marriages or marriages that aren’t quite as rosy as they would have thought still prefer to be in their current position than to brave the storm again and become alone. Now you may say the national divorce percentages are astounding, but do you know of people getting divorced that their situation isn't unbearable?

I find our world’s view of singles interesting. I find our church’s view of singles interesting. I find them interesting when I think of all the magnificent single people in the Bible that accomplished super-human feats. As a matter of fact, I would dare say that most of the people in the Bible who accomplished great things were single. Paul actually remarks rather against it on some occasions. Now I don’t necessarily take Paul’s side, I’m still a proponent of marriage, but my point is that we idealize marriage to an unhealthy level causing single people to fall into the vortex of lies about how much better their lives should be. “Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of steadfast love” Jonah 2:8. I think we make marriage an idol. I think we miss out on a lot of what God has to offer us because we tell ourselves what the next step of life is supposed to be and how it’s supposed to look. We wait for marriage and miss out on the abundance of steadfast love and exceeding joy that flows to us from a Savior, providing us with all we need to not only survive but to thrive. We as a church miss out on the great things single people have to offer us and we accentuate married couples as the best ministers. “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in His way” Psalm 37:7a. From a single person’s perspective, know that the pressure to settle and give in is astounding in our culture. Don’t miss out on either the greatness of singlehood or the greatness that single people have to offer you if you take the chance to get to know just how special God made them. It’s not a waiting period, it’s life. I’m not volatile; I’m actually much more stable than most.

Jonah

I just finished reading through the Book of Jonah and I never cease to resonate with the man himself. Strong willed, overly zealot on many occasions, unnecessarily passionate in some emotional areas, wanting to have the ability to figure God out down to an art of knowing what He will and won’t do, firm in my own opinions, convinced I know what’s best in life, hot tempered to a fault. Yeah, (sigh)…I resonate with Jonah. “For I knew that You are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and relenting from disaster” Jonah 4:2b. As much as I disagree with the Catholics on the point of confession, I still find myself willing to go along with it if it means having my sins forgiven instantaneously if only I say them aloud. What’s the joke? Something about how Catholics flood to mass and confession on Sundays because of what they did on Saturday night? Sounds silly and yet most of us operate on the same standard. We do things we know aren’t right because we want to play both sides. We want the instant gratification and satisfaction and yet we want the forgiveness and free ticket to eternal rewards.

We believe in a god that forgives us of all our sins immediately and without regard to why we committed them or whether we are planning on committing them again. We emphasize the grace and mercy part of God because we need something to make us feel better because of our total depravity. We have churches either disregarding our depravity and making everyone think everything’s peachy or churches that bang depravity so far into your heads that you feel helpless against sin. Either way, the unfortunate end for many listeners that choose not to be individual thinkers is that we sin and then believe in a god who realizes we don’t mean to and so of course forgives us. We believe, far too often, in a god of our own concoction, our own imagination, a god that makes our lives make more sense and that makes us feel better about what we’re doing.

Jonah knew God, and he for sure knew he couldn’t hide from Him. I think when Jonah fled at first he thought, “This is going to make me mad, God. You’re going to save these dreadful people who have been living as though they have nothing to lose. These people who call out your name half-heartedly, the believers who slide by in society and yet aren’t really committed, and yet you’re still going to save them. I hate this, God. Is there any reason I’m following whole-heartedly right now when people who get to play both sides still make it?” But you know what my favorite part of this whole event is? We get to see a different trait of God that makes me realize His deep intimacy and core knowledge of how each of us are woven together. God interacts with Jonah very differently from other noteworthy people in his time. Jonah practically yells and is certainly angry with God throughout this experience and yet God never blinks and acts disrespected. I think it’s because this is the way Jonah learns and the way he gets through is own stubborn nature to find the authority and greatness of God. There’s no doubt Jonah is being incredibly selfish and self-righteous but yet I think God uses His pride for His glory and ultimate will. I think God chisels down Jonah piece by piece in a way much more effective than if He had gotten mad.

There are many things I’m yet to learn about God. But as I read this passage I think I’ve discovered one more. God interacts with me much differently than He interacts with anyone else. It doesn’t mean that He’s a different God or He changes from person to person. It means that He created me so delicately, so perfectly, so intricately that He addresses me according to my need and my ability to comprehend His point. I, like Jonah, want for things that I have not right to and have a skewed version of my entitlement. We know not how far the great riches that await us outweigh anything earthly that the scales do not even tip and we too easily succumb to the manifest of appeal for earthly claim and endearment.

Grieved

When I take the time to think about the destruction and total depravity of most of our world it makes me shudder. Much too often I erase it as soon as it enters because the pain of fully divulging myself into such thoughts would last a lifetime. We don't take the salvation of others as seriously as we ought. We cast it aside and are thankful for our own salvation, as though we can rest easy and live lives of harmony because we've "found" God and everything else is taken care of. WRONG.

"Woe to those who lie on beds of ivory and stretch themselves out on their couches, and eat lambs from the flock and calves from the midst of the stall, who sing idle songs to the sound of the harp and like David invent for themselves instruments of music, who drink wine in bowls and anoint themselves with the finest oils, but are not grieved over the ruin of Joseph!" Amos 6:4-6.

Are you grieved over the ruin of our world? Are you grieved because even whole churches and certainly active participants in other places of worship actually abhor God and do not follow His teachings? Are you saddened that people have the option of church and yet do not attend because they see it as hypocritical or they are too "busy" to go? Are we grieved?

We're not so different from the people back in the Old Testament are we? We still overindulge and take our eyes off of the prize. We still sit idly as the world continues to fall into utter darkness. We still do things that bring us temporary comfort because we have never chosen to taste the eternal reward that God holds right in front of us everyday. We are much too easily pleased with the trivial and we settle for momentary happiness that flees as quickly as it came. It flees because it wasn't meant to fill the space we're giving it. It flees because only God can fill that void and yet therein lies the great mystery about why we struggle so indepthly to fight off His reign.

I look at the verses from Amos and I realize we're a whole lot like these people. We want the finest things, we want the nicest meals and richest furniture. We want the big houses and fine living. But does it bring us joy? There's always going to be someone that has more, that's more successful, that's smarter, that's thinks more indepthly, that's more intuitive, that's more fun, that's more cunning, that's prettier, that can outsmart you. There's always going to be someone. But what matters is that which is eternal. The salvation of others matter. It matters much more than gold or silver. Think about it- we long for riches like beds of ivory just as the Israelites but we're going to a place where the streets are paved with gold if we decide to cast aside those beds of ivory for now and focus on the plans of the Lord and working out His salvation in our lives. On one hand you have something fleeting and on the other you have someonething WAY better that is also eternal. I think I'll choose the streets of gold and wait to see how much better the bed must be than ivory.

Secrets

"You only have I known of all the families of the earth; therefore I will punish you for all your iniquities. Do two walk together unless they have agreed to meet? Does a lion roar in the forest when he has no prey? Does a young lion cry out from his den if he has taken nothing? Does a bird fall in a snare on the earth when there is no trap for it? Does a snare spring up from the ground when it has taken nothing? Is a trumpet blown in a city and the people are not afraid? Does disaster come to a city unless the Lord has done it? For the Lord does nothing without revealing His secret to His servants the prophets" Amos 3:2-7.

Reading this passage a few days ago, it struck me, but I wouldn't fully indulge myself into the context and force of its heavy words. Still today I find it difficult to admit to what it says and comply to the entirety I understand it to be. We have no secrets in life that God doesn't know. Every sin or error committed by us is our fault and we should know better. Verse two tells us that the Israelites continue to sin and God in His sovereignty and authority says that He will punish them for everything. "Do two walk together unless they have agree to meet?" Things don't happen by chance, we understand deep down what we get ourselves into and we know ourselves well enough to know what our limits are. So often we test those limits for personal pleasure or indulgence and would rather feel remorse later and ask God's forgiveness on the flip-side than to not put ourselves in the situation in the first place. We love self more than we love others and especially more than we love God.


"Does a bird fall in a snare on the earth when there is no trap for it?" We act surprised when we get into a bind. We act like we think we're immortal and yet we so often are out solely for ourselves and our pleasure. I read an article the other day saying that the average person lies 3 times every 10 minutes. I can think of a zinger or two I've told in the last few days that you find yourself thinking, "oh no, words are coming out of my mouth! why am I saying this to rectify a situation I don't know anything about to make myself seem more important? Why am I always wanting to be right and know everything?" Evil traps are set for us everywhere, particularly as believers. We want to save face after we make a mistake to cover up when maybe the trap was not the mistake but was the urge to lie or act in a certain way that misleads people. Maybe the traps around us are designed to be really enticing and attractive and so we purposely fall into them even though we know the birds end. Will the trap reveal itself and its wicked scheme until it's encompassed you if you get close to it? (5b)--not a chance. Not until you're caught or turn away so fully that the snare awaits a later date to come back and begin its trapping again when it thinks you again weak.

Does anything happen outside of God's knowledge and maybe even God's authority, dominion and actual actions themselves? We so often see God as this great mystery that chooses on a spur of the moment kind of basis what to do next. He says in verse 7, "For the Lord God does nothing without revealing His secret to His servants the prophets." If that's true and we don't have modern day prophets then everything we need to know, all the answers and all the secrets, is contained in the Holy Word of God in its entirety. God may choose to reveal His secrets to you or I in prayer or in reading His Word but how will we know unless we do?

We blaze our own paths in vain.

A Few Stories

A few stories for you...

A friend of mine and I were getting together a few days ago after work. I ran some errands in her area right around the time she was getting off so that we could meet up right after, according to the plan. Almost three hours after our scheduled meet up she calls. Obviously I'm pretty upset by this time, needless to say it's the blood that runs through my veins. However, I found myself during this time of stalling around her area, continuing to think that any minute she'd call, that I had no where else to go. It reminded me of Peter talking with God after the disciples grumbled about a rather taboo topic both then and now. "After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with Him. So Jesus said to the Twelve, 'Do you want to go away as well?' Simon Peter answered Him, 'Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God.'" John 6:66-69. I needed her at that moment and was willing to wait as I wish I continually realized my very same need for God.

I heard a great man, a mighty man of our age, speak last week about the rough road of being a disciple, of being a Christian in our culture, and about how often we will have to be completely different than society and its norms. He spoke boldly and unabated, quit a relief from most modern day sympathetic christians. As I walked out of the worship service a guy in the group of people I found myself with commented how utterly boring he found the speaker and a girl agreed with him and continued on about his overly zealous manner and how offensive he sounded to those weak in the faith. I got in my car, as I had thankfully met them there, and instantly needed someone to talk to that understood the great depth of insight and intuition this man had spoken and the great need our society has for more people that relish in the greatness of our God as this man does. It being late at the time therefore counting my family out of the call range I found very few people that I could scroll through my phone and find that could understand the anksed I felt from feeling truly on board with this man yet feeling completely separated and frankly offended by the christian company I resided with that night. "Lord, to whom shall I go? You have the words of eternal life, and I have believed, and come to know that You are the Holy One of God."

I counseled, or maybe I should rather say spoke with, a man yesterday at the Urban Ministry Center that sat down in my office and point blank told me he was going to commit suicide. He had been in and out of mental hospitals for the last few years and had attempted suicide multiple times. When I asked why he was never able to go through with it he said it was because he never had enough resolve to carry it out. He said life wasn't worth living and he was tired. I asked if he knew God. He said Yes. I asked if he read the Bible. He said yes, many time in fact. He said he left it behind when he decided to become homeless, thinking that homelessness would be the last straw and would give him the gumption to kill himself. I said so it wasn't important enough for you to take with you? He said it was like an anchor to him, holding him steady and keeping him fighting and trying to make things work. It was an answer and a way. It was proof of an after life and forced a need to persevere to obtain eternity with God. He said he left it behind so he didn't have to think about it anymore and could end his tired life. "To whom shall we go, you have the words of eternal life?" I told him you can never escape and why do we want to?

Why do we want to...sounds so much easier than it really is, huh? Why do we want to escape from God? Because He is truth and He knows everything about us. If we deal with Him then we have to admit our faults, realize our errors and flee from the sins that frankly we kinda like keeping around. Sure, He's ultimate comfort and fulfillment, but it's an eternal thing and doesn't mean we will instantly ever feel comforted or fulfilled. It's a perseverance battle. It's immediate decisions to go against the popular decision, to stand alone in a crowd, to feel alone in many instances and realizations. It's tough love that many people will not immediately appreciate. It's fighting against our own natures to be what Christ wants and spurs us on to be. It's not letting the desires of the world weigh us down and convince us that we need the same things. Why do we want to run from God like many of Jesus' followers? Because if we cleave to God then we have to run from the world's ways and run from our very nature. But in the end you will find yourself saying along with Peter, "To whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life" because the reward is so much greater than any momentary enjoyment we can find here on earth.

Flesh is so weak

"Sow for yourselves righteousness; reap steadfast love; break up your fallow ground, for it is the time to seek the Lord, that He may come and rain righteousness upon you" Hosea 10:12

I read this verse last night and the subsequent verses and thought how applicable it is to my current life and probably yours. NOW is the time to seek the Lord, while He still may be found. NOW, not later, not when you're less tired or when all that paperwork gets done. Not right after your pop that movie in or go run a few errands. Not after you already get to work or after you do your morning schedule. But NOW. Ok, maybe I'm speaking a little more to myself here but I far to often wake up and think I can sleep a little later and read my Bible after I get out of the shower. I think I can run those morning errands and then I'll have time to sit down and pray, when it's "more convenient" to my schedule. I think, after I go to this meeting then I have the rest of the day off so I'll wait, and here's the good Christian kicker, so I'll have 'more time' to sit down and do it instead of right now. It's so wrong.

Jesus commands us, "Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak" Matthew 26:41. I've realized recently that I would have to put a "so very" in front of weak from Jesus' words. My flesh is so very weak. I give in to fatigue, convincing myself that I'm treating my body like a holy temple like God also commands. Here's the truth. If we want to justify our actions to make ourselves feel more spiritual or holy we can, there's always a band aid in scripture. But, if you're wanting it to be like it was intended, in it's authenticity, then it's not a band aid to make you feel better, but it's also not a bullet to make you helpless. Hosea says, "Sow for yourselves righteousness; reap steadfast love, break up your fallow ground."

There are things in my life I'm not proud of, things I hold onto that aren't good for me. There are sins that I commit over and over and I still don 't trust God enough to let them go. I'm choosing not to break up my fallow ground. But you know, because I'm not doing it I'm withholding the shower of righteousness that He promises to rain on me. I act like the Israelites did in Hosea and I act as though that won't be my end. "You have plowed iniquity; you have reaped injustice; you have eaten the fruit of lies. Because you have trusted in your own way and in the multitude of your warriors" v13.

God help us to trust in Your Way, in Your path, in Your direction. Our spirit is willing, but our flesh is so very weak. Let us break up our fallow ground, sow righteousness and reap steadfast love. Let us seek You, Father, while You may be found and while You are near. Teach us how faulty our way is and the great deficiencies of our human defenses and solutions. Let us glimpse your great abundance so that we might be able to more accurately weigh our scales to find how much more valuable your gifts are than our own resources. Let your strength outweigh our fleshly weakness everyday.